Bedtime

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2007
Bedtime
17
Wed, 04-25-2007 - 1:35pm

My 14 year old son (turns 15 in July) is seeking to extend his bedtime past 11:00 PM (he wakes up at 7:00 AM for high school). He is a wonderful student (3.9 GPA) who is really hitting his stride in school this year. He has requested 20 more minutes at night to watch television. He is basically a couch potato already as he isn't athletic and he watches at least 4 hours of television already. When I denied his request for an "extension", he began to debate the topic ad nauseum until I inevitably lost my patience and began to yell.

Just looking for some thoughts and opinions of others who may have faced a similar situation.

Although many other kids in his grade have begun to experiment with alcohol, he has shown no interest at all and we openly discuss the issue. I know that we need to set limits but my wife has said "we should be happy that this is our problem considering what other parents are dealing with and perhaps we should grant his request".

Thoughts?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2005
In reply to: knewjerzee
Mon, 05-07-2007 - 8:24am

My almost 13 DD goes to bed between 9:00 and 9:30 (usually closer to 9:00). She gets up at 7:00. She doesn't like to stay up late on weekends and is usually the first to sleep at sleepovers!

My 10 yo son, on the other hand, goes to be at the same time, but ALWAYS is up before 6:15 on his own. He loves to stay up late on the weekends--like 1:00 or 2:00 if he has friends over!

Karin

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: knewjerzee
Mon, 05-07-2007 - 1:45pm

My 13 yr old goes to bed at 9:30 and gets up at 6.

Surviving Middle & High School
Avatar for mjaye2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: knewjerzee
Mon, 05-07-2007 - 2:06pm
My kids are older than 13, but even when they were that age, I never had a set bedtime for them. They are both night-owls (the older much more so than the younger) and will stay up til anywhere between 10:00 - 11:00 at night. They get up at 7:00 so I could take them to school when I left for work at 7:30. Actually, once older ds started driving, he would sleep til 7:30 and make it to school by 8:00. If one is really tired, then he may go to bed at 8:00 and sleep all night. Ds20 is of the nature that if I *made* him go to bed at a certain time, then he would lay there, awake, in the dark until hell froze over. :) He actually got much more sleep by my letting him *set* his own bedtime.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2004
In reply to: knewjerzee
Mon, 05-07-2007 - 5:52pm

I am the same. I actually stopped having "enforced" bedtimes when the kids started middle school.

My kids go to bed when they are tired. The only rule is that,after 11pm, all "electronic devices" are shut off unless the kids were working on some assigment that has to get done for the next day.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2007
In reply to: knewjerzee
Tue, 05-08-2007 - 7:48am
DD14 has a bedtime of 10pm on a school night, before midnight on weekends. She definitely needs her sleep. I can tell a huge difference in her attitude when she goes to bed late. If given the choice, she would stay up later on school nights. But, I don't see that happening. When she goes to bed at 10, she goes to sleep.
Avatar for kel7col4
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: knewjerzee
Tue, 05-08-2007 - 10:56am

My kiddos don't have bed times either. We are all night owls. DD, my freshman, for the most part goes to bed between 10 and 11 on school nights and gets up anywhere between 5 and 6 am to catch the bus at 6:30. At one point I tried to enforce a bedtime and it quickly became a battle I didn't want to pick - I simply told her "you start waking up late and missing the bus we will revisit bedtimes" - she has never missed the bus.

DS 5th grade did have a 9pm bedtime, again there was always something he wanted to do, so out of frustration, I gave up trying to enforce it. After a few nights of staying up to 11, he came up to me and said "Why haven't you been telling me to go to bed?" I simply said I didn't want to debate with him every night at 9 so I left it to him. Ever since then, he has gone to bed at 9:30 on his own. He gets up at 7 to catch the bus at 8am.




iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2006
In reply to: knewjerzee
Tue, 05-08-2007 - 12:57pm
My DD (13) and DS (12) usually get to bed between 9:30 and 10. I don't have a set time and will allow them to stay up later if there is something special on TV. They don't watch alot of TV but we do have our shows that we watch as a family. On the weekends I let them stay up later but they usually sleep in until 9:00.
Suzanne

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