'Come Get Me' Code for Teens

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
'Come Get Me' Code for Teens
12
Thu, 03-08-2007 - 11:22am

Do you have a 'Come Get Me' Code with your teens? A special phrase or key word that your teens can say as part of a normal conversation that says to you 'Come get me! I'm in over my head and/or in an uncomfortable situation!'?

DH came up with a way for DD or DS could let us know in an 'I need to check-in with my parents' sort of way that would let us know they were in a spot they needed to get out of. It is actually pretty clever in that no one listening in on the conversation would realize or know that they were really sending out an SOS.

If DH or I hears that 'key phrase' as a part of the 'checking-in' convo, our response is " We hate to ruin your fun, BUT something has come up and we're coming to get you -- right now".

This was prompted by a situation with DS last weekend and made to think of again when reading Sue's 'Sweet 16' post.

Just wondered if anyone else does something like this.

 

 

 

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2003
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 3:50pm

WE do......he's never used it of course, but we've told both boys to call or indicate that they are ill and we'll know to get them NOW.......a stomach ache is what I used to them as an example. They can be 'cool' and be as if we've asked them how they are, and they can casually mention a stomach ache, and boom...we'll be there........

My oldest would never think of using it, I'm sure, but hopefully he feels better to know he HAS a way out..........

we also have a no questions policy.....if they are brave enough to call us to get them out of a bad situation, UNLESS we can tell they've partaken in drinking or drugs, or of course if assult or something has taken place.... we won't press for details so they don't have to feel like they are 'ratting' on their friends. Some may disagree with that, but my ONLY obligation is to keep my own safe, and if protecting someone else will allow MY CHILD to make better choices, than so be it. WE've also assured them that if a friend gets into trouble, or has a problem, that it won't affect their ability to hang out with that friend. WE are hoping by telling them if THEY make good choices, we can trust them, even with someone who may have previously done something wrong........again, some may disagree, but my kid needs to feel independent yet safe and protected......how does a parent effectively do this? So these are the few measures we have in place.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
Sat, 03-10-2007 - 10:29pm
This is such a great suggestion. I was just telling my husband about it this morning, but then forgot to discuss it with my daughter. We just picked her up from a party where she felt very uncomfortable and was too embarrassed to call us to pick her up. If only we had remembered to talk about a code with her before she left! Luckily, she was fine but she will be prepared next time.

Pages