Daughter's romance charges Mom's libido
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Daughter's romance charges Mom's libido
| Fri, 02-23-2007 - 1:21pm |
This is a whole new world for me. I am a happily married (24 years) 48 year old woman who has always had a pretty low sex drive. My daughter has her first boyfriend (she's 15) and I can't believe how her relationship has affected me. I feel like I did when I first fell in love with my husband. I have no appetite, I am thinking about sex a lot, I am feeling very romantic toward my husband, I enjoy seeing them together (cuddling).
I have no interest romantically with the boyfriend, we both like him very much. I just feel so strange and wonder if I am a total wierdo or if this happens to others. I am so embarrassed I can't even discuss this with my friends.

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Isn't that the truth!! :D
We went to a poker party last night at dh's aunts house. DD and bf were there along with dd's million cousin's (dd's the oldest of all the cousins) DD and bf were cuddling on the couch (sitting up and with the lights on and with all the million cousin's around them) and of course dh (who's been gone the whole time they've been dating!!) was definitely in a state of shock!!! I'm not sure who I felt sorry for at that moment!!
Oh kel.... what can I say?? Yeah, that "makin' ya crazy" happens all the time. Hubby has been out of the military for awhile, but he also works construction. From March thru December he's gone all week long, sometimes a couple of weeks straight. I manage to deal with him over the weekends then, but when he takes his seasonal lay off, he gets in my way, upsets my applecart, messes with my routines - and is looking for all this "togetherness." come on already - I got stuff to do! ;) LOL
Ummm..... if your DH is freaking about a little cuddle with the lights on, sitting up, with all the little cousins milling around, what is he going to say if she ever starts sleeping with him? I know, I know.... I thought my DD wouldn't either, but she did... and hubby does NOT want to know.
Rose
I must have missed an earlier post.... Oh Rose, how are you handling it? Did she tell you? My DS never tells me anything regarding girls, much less sex. I still keep trying to talk to him, but I guess at some point I have to give up... (maybe when he's 30? hehe)
zz
Well, cat, I guess I could see it was coming, so I wasn't horrendously shocked. Kinda sad that my baby girl has taken yet another step toward womanhood, and this one about 3 years earlier than I'd hoped. Initially I found out kinda by accident - DD had one of those careless moments when she left things laying around that she probably shouldn't have, but maybe she purposely left it laying out? Then one afternoon when she was in my office at work and we were the only ones around I asked her about it. To be honest, I'm not sure what she finds so attractive about her b/f - definitely not what I'd call hottie material, not even "looker" material - but he's very good to her and they have a lot of fun together. It's a little easier to deal with this step in their relationship because we like T a lot... if he were the weenieboy from hell (to borrow daddioe's word) I think I'd be freaking out a whole lot more than I am.
Rose
Thanks - I am very careful about what I say about K (the best friend). The excitement of this first romance is a lot of fun for my daughter and we do like him, so right now, it seems fine.
Yesterday C (my daughter) was chatting with us and told us that she plans to go the a large state university (in two years). I know that K has plans to go there and doesn't want to go alone and is working C hard to go with her. I went to the this school my freshman year. C has in the past expressed disdain for this school. I am seeing this controlling behaviour and it making me crazy! I told C that we had to do research and figure out the best school for her (not making an issue that K cannot dictate her major life decisions). C is a good student and very bright - she doesn't have a sense yet of what she'd like to do - but I know her and I feel a smaller school would be much better for her or even Community College for the first two years. By the way, the reason K wants to go to the big state school is that: 1) it's cool 2) it's a party school 3) there is a great mall nearby. I am hoping that as a sophomore this decision is a bit down the road and C will mature and have the strength to pull away and make her own decisions (not just for us and not for K).
The other more current issue is that in our High School students can take consortium classes in another district that are more vocational. C is definately college material and would never consider this track. K's sister took this program and she wants to and she wants C to go with her! So, you can see my frustration. Several other parents have commented to me about K's influence on C -- it's not just me.
I think I have to ride it out and help her see her options and at the end of the day, if she expects us to pay for college and the decision to attend the state school is not a solid one (based on her interests and what the school can offer) we just won't pay for it. K's parents are in a different financial situation and it't not an issue for them. K is the girl who has two real Coach bags......
Thanks so much for letting me vent, and I do appreciate your words of wisdom.
B
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