hi, and sorry for the bad typing but i only have 4 fingers right now...one;s in a splint.lol
i don;t have any great answers but i;m going thru the exact same thing with my dd17. she;s been a great teenager all the way through. no sex, drugs, alcohol, parties, or anything. she;s in her senior year now ranked 30 in a class of 429 with a 4.359 gpa. but her bf is a drug addict and probably an alcoholic too. i don;t get it either. she started dating him when she was 16 and only in groups, cos that was the rule at the time. they;ve broken up once and got back together after he promised to do better. but its only gotten worse. she;s most recently confronted him with his problems and he;s again promised to quit his addictions. the last time she and i talked she agreed that she needed to break up with him but she says she just doesn;t like "ending" relationships. aaargh.
she;s even talked to my bf about it and he;s told her the same basic stuff. you don;t need this in your life, he;s just going to drag you down, etc. she hasn;t told me about the break-up yet, so i assume it hasn;t happened. i don;t know why or how she could make such bad choices or be okay with being in such a bad relationship.
but here;s what i tell myself to feel better: she;s still very young. she;s still in my home, and for the most part "under my control". at least she;s making this horrible mistake now, while there;s not the chance for a marriage or kids or some other, permanent life-altering mistake. hopefully, she will learn a permanent life lesson from this guy to never, ever enter another relationship with someone who uses ever again. she still talks to me about it, i try not to be judgmental. i try to focus on his behaviors, which i don;t like, and remind her that i don;t have anything against him, but that his behaviors are concerning. i try to support her and help her see her way through it. at least she is going through this while she lives with me and i can watch closely what is going on.
in many other ways, i am a very, very strict mom. i definitely don;t want to forbid this. i have to let her make some mistakes. i have rules, an early curfew, they can;t be alone together in either house, etc. but he never comes over here, so at least you have that going for you. he;s also been given "the talk" by her dad and he;s met my bf in uniform (he;s a corrections sergeant). he *does* have
hi, and sorry for the bad typing but i only have 4 fingers right now...one;s in a splint.lol
i don;t have any great answers but i;m going thru the exact same thing with my dd17. she;s been a great teenager all the way through. no sex, drugs, alcohol, parties, or anything. she;s in her senior year now ranked 30 in a class of 429 with a 4.359 gpa. but her bf is a drug addict and probably an alcoholic too. i don;t get it either. she started dating him when she was 16 and only in groups, cos that was the rule at the time. they;ve broken up once and got back together after he promised to do better. but its only gotten worse. she;s most recently confronted him with his problems and he;s again promised to quit his addictions. the last time she and i talked she agreed that she needed to break up with him but she says she just doesn;t like "ending" relationships. aaargh.
she;s even talked to my bf about it and he;s told her the same basic stuff. you don;t need this in your life, he;s just going to drag you down, etc. she hasn;t told me about the break-up yet, so i assume it hasn;t happened. i don;t know why or how she could make such bad choices or be okay with being in such a bad relationship.
but here;s what i tell myself to feel better: she;s still very young. she;s still in my home, and for the most part "under my control". at least she;s making this horrible mistake now, while there;s not the chance for a marriage or kids or some other, permanent life-altering mistake. hopefully, she will learn a permanent life lesson from this guy to never, ever enter another relationship with someone who uses ever again. she still talks to me about it, i try not to be judgmental. i try to focus on his behaviors, which i don;t like, and remind her that i don;t have anything against him, but that his behaviors are concerning. i try to support her and help her see her way through it. at least she is going through this while she lives with me and i can watch closely what is going on.
in many other ways, i am a very, very strict mom. i definitely don;t want to forbid this. i have to let her make some mistakes. i have rules, an early curfew, they can;t be alone together in either house, etc. but he never comes over here, so at least you have that going for you. he;s also been given "the talk" by her dad and he;s met my bf in uniform (he;s a corrections sergeant). he *does* have