Fed up

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
Fed up
27
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 9:48am

I just need to vent about how overwhelming the upkeep of my kids and home has become. I know everyone will tell me my kids need to be doing more. I know, I know, I know! But it seems that in the past year or two, things have just gone out of control as far as the mess they create in this house and the expenses that they generate. They will do chores when asked without too much complaining, but I can't say they jump at the chance to help out. Also, with the endless hours they spend on marching band from August through November, I feel like they have enough on their plate keeping up with that and homework. (Although I must admit it doesn't seem to cut into their computer and TV time any!)


That said, the laundry alone could provide enough work for a full-time employee! I keep up with the laundry pretty well. DH and I, combined, don't generate half as much as my DD15. I went up to her room this morning, and nearly cried. I could barely lift her hamper! This is the girl who keeps complaining to me that I need to take her out and buy her more and more clothes. Yet you can barely walk in her room or bathroom without stepping on some article of clothing. And that's not counting what she had stuffed into and on top of her overflowing hamper. It will take me all day today and probably part of tomorrow just to get her clothes clean. My son is slightly better, although he has been known to take perfectly clean clothes off the hanger and put them right into the dirty laundry! His problem is leaving trash all around the house. Today, I found an empty candy wrapper in one of my family room drawers. Just the other day, we had a swarm of ants in the house because he left food in his backpack. He stuffs wrappers under chair cushions too. AARGH!


I decided to clean bathrooms today, and I couldn't even start in my DD's bathroom because she has so much STUFF all over every conceivable surface. I usually dump it all into a basket and let her deal with it later, but this time it's too much for even that. I will make her clean up when she gets home, but I can't understand how I raised a kid who thinks it's OK to live like that. (I know--she needs to be the one to do the cleaning; but if I wait for that, it will never happen and I don't want her growing up thinking this is how things should look.)


And that's not even mentioning the expenses. Marching band is through the roof, then it's always something....going to the movies, going to concerts, "needing" new clothes, spending money for marching band shows...I give them each an allowance, but it's never enough. Most of the "healthy snacks" I bought for the week on Saturday are already gone and it's only Tuesday!


Well, if you read this far, thank you. Am I the only one in this dilemma? I hate being a drill sergeant, but I'm going to get tough today. I'm going to disconnect the computer & TV, and no one is doing anything until they clean up after themselves.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 10:32am

I'm so sorry you're having a tough day ... {{{hugs}}} are being send your way.


I know exactly how you feel.

 

 

 

Avatar for coldfingers
Community Leader
Registered: 04-30-2000
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 10:35am

Boy, can I relate to your post!!!

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2006
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 11:04am

Oh, ejteach - sending great big hugs your way! And no, you are not alone. I work fulltime Monday through Friday, but I did so much work and running around this past week-end, it felt like I never got any time to myself and that I truly worked a 7-day week. I was almost to the point of tears! However, I did tell both of my kids that they were going to do their own laundry from this point on. I had all of us pick a day of the week in which to do laundry - my daughter will do it on Friday and my son will do it on Saturday. I will do my own laundry on Sunday. I hate doing it this way because it seems so self-centered, but I can't go through another week-end like I just did. (And my dd is every bit as disorganized and messy as yours). On the other hand, they both know that their bedrooms and bathrooms have to be clean by the close of Saturday or I will clean them (and I get paid from their allowance for being their maid). So at least once a week, things look fairly good.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2007
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 11:23am

Right there with all of the posts!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 12:37pm
Thanks for your comments and support!! I hope I didn't give the impression that I am incompetent in the housekeeping department! LOL. Far from it--I do manage to keep up with things, and the rest of us all have clean clothes. Today was just my day for doing DD's laundry, and it was just so daunting. What's frustrating is that even though I'm organized and work hard to stay on top of things, these two darling children undermine me at every turn! I would really like it if they could learn to do some daily upkeep, such as straightening their bathrooms, etc. Given where we are right now, that doesn't seem too likely!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 12:43pm

<>


I really, really like this idea!!


Avatar for weberdns0
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2000
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 12:47pm
I'm right with you and gotten tough!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 12:48pm

<<I hope I didn't give the impression that I am incompetent in the housekeeping department>>


Heavens no!

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 12:53pm

<<I disagree with the poster that said that school is their primary job and that they aren't expected to help out with chores, but by helping with chores they are helping out theh family.>>


That would be me and I didn't mean to imply that my kids don't ever help out.

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2004
In reply to: ejteach2007
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 1:14pm

<<>>


Here's a suggestion...


Announce to DD that DH is now in charge of all the laundry. That should take the load off in a New York minute. Worked for us..

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