? graduation party question ?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2005
? graduation party question ?
8
Tue, 02-07-2006 - 12:31pm
o.k.....this may sound trivial, but I'm trying to figure this out. My DD will be graduating on June 4th from high school. We want to have a party for her on June 10th. My questions are: do we mix both mine and my husbands families along with our friends as well, or do we do this seperately? We're not late night people so we were thinking of an afternoon event, around 12:00. I'd love some ideas. So, how do we manage all the parties? there are about 6-8 other graduates that will have parties and we don't want to miss out? I was thinking of sending a e-mail now to let them mark their calenders. Am I being pushy by starting so soon to plan this? Having an only child means I can only do these parenting things once, that's it. I'm looking forward to having a fun time with this. Thanks for any advise and especially any party ideas!
Avatar for momtb4
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 02-07-2006 - 12:37pm
Definately mix them up. This falls in the same catagory as a wedding, you don't have 3 separate weddings so your family, his family and the kids friends will be separated. Do send out info as soon as you have it. I've been planning since last spring, so you aren't as ahead of the game as you might think. BUT, I'm planning the Senior All Nighter, for the entire graduating class. I highly recommend finding out if there is such a thing happening at your school and get in on the planning. It's a TON of work and everyone wants to attend, but no one wants to put it together. We have over 200 graduating seniors and about 15 parents attend meetings, only about 5 people actually do anything, and 2 of those are doing the bulk of the work. There is plenty of work to go around, if people would just step up. (sorry, I hijacked your post to vent...)
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2000
Tue, 02-07-2006 - 4:13pm
We just went thru our first graduation last spring.
Pam
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2005
Tue, 02-07-2006 - 4:33pm
I agree with the open house. We did that also last year. Graduation was on Saturday and many people had their parties on that day after the morning graduation. We did ours on Sunday. I would definitely just have one open house for everyone and if you can do it the weekend before graduation you are less likely to have conflict with others. And you really do have to start planning early especially if you are catering or if you have to rent tables or anything. Good luck and enjoy this time.
Avatar for mily12
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Registered: 11-18-2003
Tue, 02-07-2006 - 5:25pm

Open House parties are popular around here, also but I've never been able to figure out how one plans for a meal if people are coming and going at all hours. Even if you don't do a full meal, how do you keep the food platters from being emptied in the first hour? I suppose the idea is to continuously fill them or to put a few out at a time. I like the idea of a set time for eating. That's just me, though. Like I said, Open Houses are the thing here.

We don't normally like to mix families (either side) and friends, but we have mixed them for our graduation parties. Like someone said, you don't have seperate weddings and so why have seperate graduation parties.

As to notifying everyone, I'd do so soon. This way everyone can save the date.

Have fun,

Mily :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2005
Wed, 02-08-2006 - 12:24pm

I have an "only", too! You do everything for the first and last time! I definately agree on the open house and mixing. In this area, graduation parties run the gamut... from huge events - catered, rented halls, entertainment to the kind I will probably have - a gathering at my home with me cooking. Last year, my niece had one for her dd at their house. It was a nice day and we were able to be outdoors. She had a great idea - she and my sister did most of the cooking, but she hired someone to make sure that things like the salad bowls and chafing dishes were full AND she cleaned up. My niece was able to enjoy the party without spending a fortune.

Between my family and Dh's, we will have from 1 to 4 graduation parties every year for the next 15 years! And then there will be weddings and baby showers...

Oh - and you aren't thinking too far ahead. My other niece has been planning her dd's graduation for over a year!

Good luck!
jt

Avatar for heartsandroses2002
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-08-2006 - 1:36pm

Oh my Goodness, I feel so behind. My dd will graduate in June and as of right now, I haven't really given her graduation celebration much thought - I've been so focused on college apps and aid forms!!

It sounds so nice to have open houses....I am wondering if that's something we could do. Now I have another "to do" thing on my list.

Our main problem is familial issues with my sister whose 17dd will be graduating with my dd in June. My sister, before Thanksgiving, told all my family that she's having a HUGE graduation party. Earlier, before we had our falling out, she told me that she wasn't even having a party for her dd since this was her last child and she was likely going to just invite friends over. Then, after out falling out, she changed everything. So now my family is going to her house. A "normal" family would be able to have a together graduation party or something, but not us. Anyway, my ex's family will likely show up and some of our close friends, but that's about it. My dd and I have discussed the possibility of just having a small BBQ or going to a local casual restaurant the evening of the graduation. Not sure what we'll do.

Thanks for the food for thought.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2005
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 9:33am
Good to hear someone else is "behind". I haven't really given much thought to this either. We didn't have a big party for the oldest and I doubt we will for youngest either. She graduates 2 days before her 18th birthday so I guess we'll do a combo thing with primarily family - probably a cookout. I totally understand the college app and financial aid forms taking up all the time. We've been swamped with it. I also get the "normal family" problem. I have one sister-in-law that I love to death, after all who could possibly stay married to my brother all these years (that alone earns her brownie pts in my book). The problem is this sister-in-law can't stand my MIL. MIL is very overbearing with her generosity. She is a very talkative person and can't accept that SIL is quiet and prefers to be left alone. A simple how are you is all the conversation SIL wants. MIL gives her the 3rd degree just trying to be nice. Therefore, SIL refuses to come to things. If SIL doesn't come, brother rarely comes. I will be very upset with him if he doesn't come to this though. He missed DD's 16th b-day for this reason and DD really, really needed family support at that time (it was during the ex-b/f stalker thing). This may be the one and only real heart-to-heart brother and I have ever had. I will also try to talk to MIL but it won't do any good - she's reached that stage where she thinks she's 80+ and she will do as she darn well pleases and to heck with everyone else.
Avatar for heartsandroses2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 9:45am

Well, thanks tobylady, you made my day. Last night I went to see our accountant and got all our tax information in order and he helped me figure out the financial portions of the FASFA forms!! EIyee!! Luckily, since my dd's colleges of choice has a rolling admissions, we are not under any strict deadlines to get the forms in ASAP.

Your MIL sounds like my sister, except my sister is only 50 - so you can imagine how overbearing she must be. My family is all spread out so it's difficult enough to get us all in the same place and since my sister will be having a party for her dd that's graduating with my dd, you'd think we could work something out. Right now it doesn't look like it. Plus, because this sister of mine is deliberately cold and almost downright mean when she talks to my dd, my dd doesn't want anything to do with my sister or her dd - can't blame her for that.

We finally have a nice yard and pool and I'd really like to just have something small and casual, so I think we're going to just tell everyone to stop by if they want. I will have plenty of finger foods and snacks on hand and later in the afternoon, depending upon who is still there, we'll BBQ. Keep it lite and easy. I'm betting that my ex-il's will be the main guests, along with a few of our friends. And that's okay.