Help! Safety issues and 17yr OSD...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Help! Safety issues and 17yr OSD...
Thu, 06-12-2003 - 5:36pm
Hi all,

I have been around parentsoup for awhile; normally hang out on the stepparenting board b/c I am a SM. However, since this is teen oriented, I thought I would post it here. How do you convince your teens that safety is important????

My oldest stepdaughter (17, will be 18 next month) moved in with us in March. There have been several occasions where she is the last one to leave the house, and she leaves the front door unlocked and the garage doors wide open. (garage goes right into our home). I have tried talking to her about safety, I have tried being a kind friend, her dad lectured her, yelled, we've tried everything, and she just cannot remember to close the dang door when she leaves!

I cannot live like this, and I'm wondering what you would do? My first thought would be take away her car for 2 weeks. However, she is in school this summer and has a part-time job, which would mean that I would have to drive her to all activities b/c my DH is self employed and works on the other side of town. I'm not in the mood to punish me; I want HER to learn the importance of safety! Grounding her from the phone is no good b/c she is hardly home anyway and she has a cell phone.

Help? I don't think it is willful resistance to doing it, I think she is just so busy thinking about her own life that she doesn't make sure all doors are shut before she leaves. I am ready to throw her out and tell her if she can't close doors when she leaves, she can't live here anymore. I really don't want to do that, but I refuse to live in a home where I do not feel safe b/c of some teen's forgetfulness.



Avatar for yuccabugg
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-12-2003 - 6:11pm
Why don't you take away something "valuable" of hers and see how she reacts? Or if you're feeling inventive, stage a mock robbery ;)
Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Thu, 06-12-2003 - 8:08pm
Change your locks to types that lock automatically when the door closes. Give everyone a key, & tell them NEVER go out without it, even to the garbage. Put a keypad lock on the garage door opener, inside AND outside. Do NOT give SD the code. Do NOT give her a garage door opener. Tell her she must park on the street. Problem solved.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-13-2003 - 12:12pm
Great advice!!