How to fix the "mean cool kid" syndrome
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How to fix the "mean cool kid" syndrome
| Sun, 09-16-2007 - 4:34pm |
DS and his friends think they are the "cool" kids at their school. (Not they necessarily are, but they think they are.)

I'm not sure how you fix "I'm too cool for my own good" right now, but I can pretty much guarentee he'll be knocked down to size next year in hs.
I don't believe that all middle school "cool kids" get knocked down to size in high school.
Right now I am reading the book "Nineteen Minutes" by Jodi Picoult.
I think you can help him develop empathy. As someone suggested, doing volunteer work. I recommend the disabled over a soup kitchen as it is easier to 'blame' the downtrodden whereas those in wheelchairs or with Down Syndrome tend to garner empathy from most
Even something like watching, with him, the TV show where they build houses for people in need-often disabled or caring for the disabled-would be helpful in showing and discussing empathy
And, watch yourself! There was a mom on another board who commented her dd was better suited to babysit than a friend because her grades were higher. She was called on it and apologized, saying she doesnt even know where that came from!!! Honestly, I think we ALL do that at some time or another.
It's judgmental, after all, and the less we do it, the better IMO. Nothing wrong with keeping your kid from the kid who sells pot behind the high school but when we discourage them from seeing the girl who gets Cs or the boy who doesnt 'do anything' with extracurriculars, we send a powerful message.
"Its really hard to teach these sorts of lessons to kids esp when they get rewarded for their behaviour in some way. Some never learn and turn into adults who treat people who are "different" with disdain. I'd say keep talking to him and when you hear him talk about someone this way or something point out what is wrong with it and how it might be hurting them. MAYBE it will sink in at some point..."
Well-said, I like your post. It is sad, isnt' it, when it carries into adulthood?
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http://www.pnhp.org/news/2009/october/meet_the_new_health_.php
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQTBYQlQ7yM