If you gave your teen's bf $600.00 to

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
If you gave your teen's bf $600.00 to
3
Mon, 03-31-2003 - 11:26pm
get his GED, then he broke up with your dd within days of giving it to him ... still registered, went for a couple weeks and then stopped going, what would you do?

My dd's friend, O's bf did just this. Her parents speak very little English and for the last 2 yrs, they were dubious about this kid. Then he broke his foot in 10 places and was laid up for 3 months, had no money as his job was contracted with no insurance of any kind, they offered to let him spend a month at their house. They fed & housed him, and ran him to dr's appts and grew to care about him. He wanted to get his GED & thought *now* was a good time to do it as he couldn't work but had no money. They gave him the $600 to do this. He moved out after 1.5 months, as per their agreement (more or less), and within a couple days broke up with O. Then he went for a short time, and now isn't going at all. These people do not have a lot of money by anyone's stretch of imagination. They are just hard working, honest people.

I think they should ask him to return the money; from what I understand, their agreement was for him to use it for *school* and if he chose not to go, I think he should be expected to return it, even if he makes monthly payments of SOME amount. I think they're feeling awkward and uncomfortable with asking him to do that.

What would you guys do?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 5:56am
My ironclad rule of lending money is never ask for it back.

I always assume that if it leaves my hand, I'll never see it again.

That means I never, ever lend money I need and I never, ever lose a friend over a loan.

I'd forget about it.

Firefly

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 7:53am
Absolutely correct. First of all, it seems like they "gave" him the money, not "lent" it to him. And secondly, never lend $ you can't afford to not get back. That's my rule (told to me by a friend of mine).

Ellen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 5:17pm
Well, actually firefly, that's true. I have the same rule.

I don't know though. This was given in good faith with the agreement it was for him to attend school and get his GED. Not to 'play' with, which is essentially what he'll do with the balance he hasn't paid yet. I just think that's wrong. I think he ought to return whatever monies are left but yeah, lessons learnt I suppose. Thanks! (& to you, too, shadymom :-)