Learning Lessons the HARD way. I snooped

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Registered: 05-12-2003
Learning Lessons the HARD way. I snooped
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Sun, 04-30-2006 - 9:14am
Well, my DD (16) has officially called it quits with the BF that we have been agonizing over for the past year after much back and forth waffling. Her cell phone was on the table and I looked through the messages... I know... I feel terrible about snooping. However, I found out the exBF was such a big cheaterpants and now I am worried for DD. He admitted to sleeping around during their relationship. Now, how do I bring up the fact that I am very concerned for DD; what if she has an STD? How do I get her to go get checked without revealing my reason for concern? She has been on the pill, so I don't think they used condoms. I am so happy she finally saw the ex for what he truly is... it takes so much restraint on my part to not give him a piece of my mind! I am not saying anything to DD either. Oh but it is so hard. Teens seem to think bad things won't happen to them, so I don't know if she will go to Planned Parenthood on her own and get checked. I am very concerned.
Debbie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2004
Tue, 05-02-2006 - 10:02am

You are a great mom. 16 is a rough age; so vulnerable and on the cusp of adulthood,but not there yet.

Warn your sweet daughter that,if she does have a SID of a serious kind, she will have to name her b/f to the health authorities. Well,that's the way it is here. You might want to discuss the procedure with your doctor and/or PP before you go,so you can prepare her.

Take Care

Avatar for jupiterfit
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Registered: 05-12-2003
Tue, 05-02-2006 - 4:41pm
I made her an appointment for Friday. I called the doctor to discuss the situation and only got her assistant. I explained to her; wow she started to cut me off when I was just beginnining to explain. Not rudely or anything, but it's a privacy issue I'm sure. That is a little frustrating. I said that I just wanted to make sure that an STD panel would be done and an HIV because DD can be a little shy and may not ask for that. The assistant was sympathetic and nice. I also requested that the doctor (a woman) talk to her about this and if it seems like she needs counseling if she could refer her. I hope it goes okay and she can move on for heavens sake. Let us get this guy out of our lives. Now I am concerned that if the tests come back negative, she will think the exBF is okay again and start talking to him again... Lord forbid!
Deb
Debbie

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