At a Loss

Avatar for kel7col4
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
At a Loss
51
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 7:19pm

I just don't know what to do for dd.




Avatar for kel7col4
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kel7col4
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 11:14pm

Thanks Julie - when you say a really good store with knowledgable people do you have any suggestions?




iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kel7col4
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 11:15pm

Mine was in special services starting at 22 mos of age because he was non-verbal. When they have 'history', its easier to just stay in special ed. I was told about 5th grade that if he had just come in, he might not have qualified based on where he was at that point.

I suspect it's harder to be eligible when they get older. Too much difficulty sorting out what is ability and what is effort and what might be emotional, blah, blah, blah. I understand at one level but that doesnt mean they shouldnt at least try.

Does the cheer squad offer any kind of help? Special tutoring for athletes in general?

If you have to go private, you have to go private

You could see about neuro psych or developmental pediatricians. The developmental pediatrician here has a child study team and they even see what I have heard called 'young adults' so dont get turned off by the ped designation

I personally dont think these type of diagnosis are ever definitive. But I do think many parents reach a place where they 'feel' the dx fits and its helping which is what matters in the end

The sibling stuff is hard. You feel you cant compliment the one doing well without putting the other down. WE had a lot of jealousy-DS3's teachers have never felt he just needed to try harder-guess Ive been 'lucky' that way-but his brothers sure did. I hide DS3s report cards so I dont have to hear DS2 whine about how he would have gotten in trouble for those grades. Pitiful I have to do that

Avatar for kel7col4
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kel7col4
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 11:17pm

Oh I definitely don't want a bipolar diagnosis, but I don't want to have my head in the sand if that is the real problem and things are made worse on add meds.




Avatar for mjaye2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kel7col4
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 11:21pm

There's a board on ivillage just for IEPs


http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/listsf.asp?webtag=iv-ppiep&nav=start


I don't "know" the cl on that board personally, but I do know she is *very* knowledgeble on the subject, she was posting on some of the boards I lurked on with ds16 school issues.

Avatar for kel7col4
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kel7col4
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 11:24pm

This is where I need to get a backbone and be pushy.




Avatar for kel7col4
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kel7col4
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 11:35pm

What's funny is DS I could have had in from the get go if that's the case - He was deaf as a doornail in his left ear until I had to pitch a fit to get him tubes and he didn't talk until he was 3.




Avatar for kel7col4
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kel7col4
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 11:37pm

Thanks, I was lurking around there earlier and trying to find my footing.




iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2004
In reply to: kel7col4
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 11:49pm

I don't have any personal experience with ADD, but my DW has taught special ed in middle and high school for 30 years. Not sure if it varies widely by area, but around here to start services at your DD's age, you are frankly going to need to make a lot of noise and not be too polite about it. Staffing and resources are stretched. Unfortunately,

Avatar for kel7col4
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kel7col4
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 12:16am

Thanks Daddio - I appreciate the insider tips :D




iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2006
In reply to: kel7col4
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 6:56am

So sorry to hear your daughter is having such a rough year - and she's geting so fustrated.

FWIW, it "shouldn't" be a war to get an IEP - there are legal safeguards that support families. Some schools make it harder than others, but you do have rights. If you are interested in looking into it, I have two suggestions. First, go to the website wrightslaw dot com This is by far the best legal "special ed" resource out there. Then, find "Parent to Parent" group in your area http://www.p2pusa.org/ These are other parents in the same situation, and finding someone local will help you with specific issues in your state/town.

Let us know how it works out.

((HUGS))

Sue, mom to Leah and Seth


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