no drive and no ambition

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
no drive and no ambition
50
Sat, 03-31-2012 - 8:03am

Hello.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Thu, 04-05-2012 - 1:57pm

Where IS that board?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2000
Thu, 04-05-2012 - 3:09pm
Parents of College Kids is under the School and Learning section of the parenting boards.
Pam
Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Thu, 04-05-2012 - 5:18pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Thu, 04-05-2012 - 10:18pm
you know, sometimes you have to work at finding something in common with other members of your family. If nothing else fake it til you make it! And your step son is very much a member of the FAMILY that you and DH chose to create when you chose to marry. Like sabr, I have a hard time with the excuse of not being able to relate to boys... first off dh is male I presume. Besides that, I am about as much of a girly-girl as one can be... and then I gave birth to sons. I have no inherent interest in sports, hunting, fishing, cars or video games but I long ago lost track of the number of hours I sat on the bleachers during football and baseball games, I have gone along on hunting and fishing trips (they always need a cook lol), and I learned how to play a few video games... badly, but play none the less. Make an effort! The same can be said for your ex and your daughters. Make your home a comfortable place for the kids on both sides to be... and if that means limiting the PDA when dss is home, well, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do for the sake of the family. I'm reading a lot of me, me, me and I, I, I and not a whole lot of we, us, and our family. Changing focus sure couldn't hurt.
Therapists aren't supposed to choose sides or tell you what to do. The role of the therapist is to help you sort out what you want and you come to your own conclusions. As for being "blown away," I might be wrong, but I think you misread your therapist's reaction. He/she may have simply been encouraging you to go on... part of the training for health care workers and mental health workers (including therapists) is to train yourself to show no reaction, no indication of being "blown away." And unless you found a pretty inexperienced therapist, he/she most likely has heard much worse than this.
Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Thu, 04-05-2012 - 11:52pm

<<>>

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Fri, 04-06-2012 - 2:02pm

The difference between you and me is that you ARE stil married to the father of your children as is Bunnie.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2007
Fri, 04-06-2012 - 3:14pm
Exactly Starting, thats what I was about to suggest, and one of the reasons I dont post here often anymore, the whole divorce/new family thing and "Disney dad" with no clue or desire how to really parent in my case - adds to any complications we have with our teens/young adults. I will see you over there!

mom_uk2socal - Mom to DS22, DS19, DD16

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Sat, 04-07-2012 - 9:28am

I like the way you handled college costs which is the way I'd rather handle it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2009
Mon, 04-09-2012 - 9:55pm

Those who posted here are not trying to be judgmental, but rather trying to provide a few thoughts on what they think they would do.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Tue, 04-10-2012 - 7:48am

Everything you say makes perfect sense about happiness.

Pages