Is this normal?

Avatar for sharo63
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2006
Is this normal?
8
Fri, 06-15-2007 - 5:11pm
I am concerned about my DD (15) and her moody/anger outbursts. She is a sweet, kind hearted girl most of the time but then there are these outbursts that get directed at either me or her bf. Now, don't get me wrong...I have a hard time pinpointing what sparks them and they don't last very long but I am worried that she will begin driving ppl in her life away by them or that this is a sypmtom of something other than typical teen girl.
Does anyone have any experience with this? Were there any things that made the episodes less frequent?
Thanks
Sharon
Avatar for suzyk2118
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Registered: 07-30-1997
In reply to: sharo63
Fri, 06-15-2007 - 5:24pm
Any way to know if it plots with her cycle?
Avatar for jbgattuso
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Registered: 04-29-2003
In reply to: sharo63
Fri, 06-15-2007 - 5:42pm

I was going to say the same thing. My DH looks at 10 days out from me getting AF and calls it the danger zone :( It's funny, but not! because I never really realized how I can get soooooo angry during that time. Now, when i was younger it didn't happen, and I think that it was because I didn't have too much stress, but now, what I have learned is for about 3 to 5 days before AF I have a hard time with stress. Teenagers today have more stress then I did. Now that I know what I am looking for, I realize that I can feel as if my head is going to blow off :( I went on some all natural vitimins for this, 5-htp and it has helped tremendously. I only take 50 mill per day, 100 was too much. It also has something in it that naturally helps you sleep. I wouldn't discount PMS...I for one feel like Jekle/Hyde :(

Julie

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2006
In reply to: sharo63
Fri, 06-15-2007 - 5:46pm

This is my DD in a nutshell - she's 80-90% a great kid with a great temperament, and then very emotional. There's usually a reason, but the response is out of proportion. Then she's fine, and usually apologizes.

I think they're mostly aimed at me - not her friends, and certainly not her dad - and sometimes she'll say "thanks for letting me vent!".

IMHO, the moodiness is part of the age - strong emotions, and not alot of ways to express them.

HTH

Sue

Avatar for sharo63
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2006
In reply to: sharo63
Fri, 06-15-2007 - 6:37pm
I wish I could blame it on PMS, but sadly it doesn't seem to coincide. It is the "disproportion" of the reaction that is so alarming. She doesn't turn it on her friends, her brothers or her father - it is me and bf. He has been in her life for a long time ( even before she was allowed to have a bf) and I hate to see her drive him away. Although sometimes lessons learned the hard way are the only way she learns them!
Thanks for the posts!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2004
In reply to: sharo63
Fri, 06-15-2007 - 7:45pm

My daughter went through a period of time when she was almost 14 when she truly was angry and a good bit of the time. That was alarming and very difficult to live through. Nowadays (she is 18) she will have those occasional outbursts and they do seem rather extreme. Unfortunately the last two she had were with the boyfriend, and I feel like they have damaged the relationship. They were also right before her period. What I find happens with my daughter is that when she is stressed (like she is right now)she tends to snap at people, mostly me, but also her bf and sometimes certain friends. I'm worried too that she is going to drive away people with her attitude. Sometimes they are aware of what her outbursts really represent (insecurity, being upset...not really anger at all) but it's still not fun to be snapped at. You might want to just keep notes (obviously nothing lengthy) on when these happen, and see if there is any particular pattern other than just her time of the month.

Nancy

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2005
In reply to: sharo63
Sat, 06-16-2007 - 10:18am
I hate to generalize, and I'm sure I'm setting myself up to be ripped here BUT in my experience my DD and her female frds all seem to be moody (throughout the month, not just 1 week) and at least in DD's case she can't always point out why. Last night she was at her softball all star game and the 20+ other girls there all had the same mad face on. The parents were all joking they're pissed that they were wasting a Friday night on softball.
I understand the OP's problem is the extreme reactions and that it's only directed at 2 people (sounds like maybe the 2 she's most comfortable with?) but it sounds totally normal for today's teen with so much stress in their lives. They need to be able to vent it out somehow and she may feel like you 2 are best able to handle it?
Good Luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2006
In reply to: sharo63
Mon, 06-18-2007 - 9:28am
Well, dadfor 6, I think I agree with you here. Before the week-end began, I was thinking of posting a "brag" at how well my 2 children were doing. Then comes Sunday (yesterday) and BOTH acted like something had taken over their bodies! I wanted to run away (but I didn't). Big time "UGH!" Anyway, I left the house for work this morning and both were still in bed. I have no idea how today is going to go! :- (
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2007
In reply to: sharo63
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 1:57am
its normal when they have small troubles and are much more easily upset b/c of hormone changes in the teenage body but u may want to read up on bipolar disorder b/c bipolar disorder often manfests in the teen yrs and the major signs are that they are very happy one sec and then very angry the next or they go through stages of several days of happy and days of depression or angry dangerous outbursts.....i sont know enough about ur child to know for sure...she could just be like me and her moos changes very quickly some people are just like that but if shes going through stages overly happy, then violntly angry, or vioently depressed u should look into bipolar disorder it is easily treatable with medications....i have worked with may clients and children who had the disorder and they were fine as long as the took the meds....but as i said it takes alot fo testing and research to diagnos any diorder...and its probably just a phase of overwhelming hormones...but i just thought i would tell u about that so u could look into if u felt u should....(((((hugs)))))
excuse my spelling its late and im exhausted :)