Okay...I need advice regarding my 18 year old son

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Okay...I need advice regarding my 18 year old son
16
Sun, 03-04-2012 - 11:03pm

Hi!

Okay...I have one of the difficult parenting situations. My son is 18 yrs old and he will be graduating in June. He has a girlfriend that he has dated for about 8 or 9 months. Her family really likes my son (and he likes them). They have been extremely nice to him. He goes to family dinners and parties when they invite him. Anyway, tonight he told me that her family invited him to go on their family trip in June. It is 2 days after his graduation. He said they have a timeshare at a beach house. Family members from all over meet up there and they have a fun filled two weeks (water skiing,etc..etc). He said her extended family wants to meet him. Of course he would like to go. My son truly is a great kid so no worries there. Our first reaction was to say YES. We were thinking that it would be great for him to go have fun after graduation. He will be working all summer and then leaving for college in the fall. So I thought it would be a great experience for him. Then I started to think that perhaps others (especially family members) would think we were crazy. LOL What do you all think? Would you allow something like this? My husband is saying that he is 18 years old and he will be out of school. He said it is his decision to make (basically that we need to allow him to grow up and make his own decisions). HELP...lol

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Community Leader
Registered: 12-16-2003

Can you find out how many others are going? Sleeping arrangements? I think if there were

Ramona  Mom to 2 great kids and wife to one wonderful hubby since 1990!

Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999

Do YOU know the family well?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
I don't have those details. I will ask him about it when he gets up. Thanks.
Avatar for turtletime
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-1998

Oh sure. My parents invited my steady high school boyfriend on a couple family camping trips senior year... seperate tents... I shared with little brother. I did a lot with boyfriend's family. They didn't really go places but I was involved in all their gatherings and such. We dated all through college too. I admit, I do get annoyed with my nieces who bring a different boy to every single family holiday but a steady boyfriend, of course, I'd be

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999

Would I allow it?

Avatar for suzyk2118
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-1997

I'm in this line. He's 18. Unless there's a concern that you would have to pay, if you had any issues with that (vs. him or her family), I wouldn't be concerned. We had ds19's gf with us on vacation for 3 of our 7 nights last summer (he'd just turned 19

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2000

I think as long as you know the family and feel they have the same basic values/guidelines as you I'd let him go. He is 18 and will be out of high school by then; I probably wouldn't have the same advice if they were, say, 15 year old sophomores.

Pam
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2009

Why are you concerned? Who cares what your family members think?

You son is a good kid. He is 18 and it sounds all on the "up and up". Listen to your DH.

By the way, a little "too much" togetherness is a perfect recipe for young couples to break up. We have a saying here.. it is called the Turkey Drop. Our Thanksgiving is in October and by then, the "turkey/high school b/f or g/f" has been dropped. Lots can change in a few months at that age.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2009
I agree.. good advice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-1998

I have an 18 year old son getting ready to graduate, also.

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