Parents Of Sexually Active Teens Board To Go

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Parents Of Sexually Active Teens Board To Go
46
Tue, 01-11-2011 - 7:53pm

I know I'm guilty of inactivity- I got sick again, oops:smileywink: but I'm really sorry to see the availability of this board go. I just looked to see if anything is going on over there and that message was it.

Ya'know, actually no, you probably don't...but I was a volunteer

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2011
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 5:59am

I understand what your trying to say...I think. This board is for parents with sex questions regarding their teens?
I dont really have any questions...but maybe I could put a question out there for other parents opinions.

I have four sons 17, 16 and 14 year old twins. When my oldest was 15 my husband started leaving a few condoms on his bed every now and then and has continued to do this with my second child

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 7:19am

Yep, btdt.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 1:16pm

EXACTLY what bunnie said!

I know there are lots of places on the 'net these days that "youth" can get information from other "youth". My biggest concern as a parent is that this information is ACCURATE. Who better to give their child ACCURATE information that parents? Parent's need to LEARN how to give their kids this information, to help the kid open up to the parent. Sure, some NEVER will, but from so many of the kids I've spoken to, they'd LOVE to feel comfortable talking about their own sexuality to their parent, but feel they can't unless the parent opens the dialogue. I felt that board was for those parents that suddenly find their teen a sexual being and need some encouragement that it dosen't make them a bad parent!

And yes, I DID provide whatever BC my girls requested, (now 24, 21 and 16). Kinda funny...but my youngest kinda red faced, asked if I could try to find a specific new condom- the Trojan Fire and Ice...I could only find 12 packs and told her unless she can find a single or three pack no way was I going to buy them if they don't know if they'll use them. A few days ago the 24yo called saying she had a spare with alot of warnings to be near a running hose because her and partner thought they would spontaneously erupt in flames, needless to say they hated them, glad I didn't spend 15.00 on the 12 pack!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2003
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 2:27pm

I too am sorry to see this board go...

It has helped me, immensly.

With info from Parents who have gone through this before me - giving me info and support.

---------------

I will say there seems to be 2 camps of parents...

One that says... it's gonna happen.. and i will help.

the second... not in my house..not on my watch.

I realize i am in the second camp.

Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 5:07pm

Educating a child about sex, sexuality, disease and contraception is not giving permission, it is giving information and making your child WISE and unafraid.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2011
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 7:57pm

I just wanted to assure everyone that the throwing condoms on the bed is not the only sex education our children have recieved. We have been very open (and age approipriate) with our children from day one. Both my husband and I came from families where sex was rarely and very briefly discussed. Also as the only female in a house of five males I wanted my sons to have an undertanding for what their future girlfriends and wives might go through each month with regards to mensturation etc.

I believe that my sons are very well informed and I am proud that we have an environment where they feel free to ask us any questions they want answered. The condoms that they are given are like the final line of defence...not the only sexual education they have received. Also as to the not under our roof issue...I would prefer that they didn't do anything under my roof...but from my own experience if teenagers are going to have sex they will find a place to do it. Would you rather them in your house? or in the backseat of a car? In a toilet? In someone elses bed at a party? on the beach? I know what I would prefer.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 11:52pm

I will say there seems to be 2 camps of parents...

One that says... it's gonna happen.. and i will help.

the second... not in my house..not on my watch.

I realize i am in the second camp.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Fri, 01-14-2011 - 12:12pm

I think some parents do have a double standard for girls & boys (and I bet it's mostly dads of boys) but as a mom of both a girl & a boy, I don't.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2009
Fri, 01-14-2011 - 2:06pm

One point I think should be made.

Our sexual drives are,by a large part,inherited and driven by our hormone levels.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Fri, 01-14-2011 - 3:29pm

Hi montana! Happy to see you again, I wondered how things are going with that bf? Still seeing each other or no?

But honestly, THIS is what I liked about that board, it DID help you find different aspects about sexual behavior to talk to

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