A parent's worst nightmare

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
A parent's worst nightmare
6
Thu, 05-22-2003 - 12:20pm
The younger brother of one of DD's classmates committed suicide yesterday. He was sixteen years old, a high school sophomore. As much as I try I cannot begin to understand or come close to knowing what his parents must be going through right now. I know that this is true for me as it must be for all of you, that as much as we may complain about our kids and wonder what on earth we were thinking when we decided to become parents, none of us would ever want this for our child. So, give your teen a hug and an extra few minutes of your time today, if only to remind yourself how precious they really are.

Lynne

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-22-2003 - 12:49pm
OMG, how awful. And yes, although they drive us up a wall sometimes, I couldn't imagine my life without my son. (even if he hates my car). One thing about our relationship (so far at least) is that we can fool around and joke around with each other and at 13, he still likes to cuddle with me, so for that I'm grateful. I can only pray that he stays the same sweet, easy going kid that he is and that if something is troubling him, I will be aware enough to know it and/or he will come to me with his problems.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Thu, 05-22-2003 - 2:05pm
Oh how awful! The family will be in my prayers. I can't imagine the grief they must be going through. And the guilt - even if there is nothing they could have done I'm sure it's there.

Pam



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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-22-2003 - 7:36pm
That poor, poor family. My heart goes out to them...
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-1999
Fri, 05-23-2003 - 1:49am
I'm so sorry to hear this. My younger dd is 16 and also a sophomore, and we just actually had a discussion about suicide a few days ago. It had to do with telling an adult if someone talks about it - even if they make you promise not to tell. I was quite surprised to hear how uncomfortable my dd was with that. In her mind, most kids talk about suicide for attention. She said she knows a lot of kids, especially girls, who actually make threats, and even weak gestures such as cutting themselves, but don't really want to die. Not that cutting isn't an awful thing to do, but in most cases it's a symptom of serious psychological problems and not a suicide attempt. I tried to tell her that if someone is talking about suicide it is way better to be safe than sorry, no matter what my dd thinks. I hope it sunk in a little.

The sad thing about boys is when they feel suicidal, they generally don't mess around. Girls threaten more, but boys who are serious about suicide usually are successful. It's just so tragic that kids can feel so hopeless about their future.

The one thing my dd said during our discussion is that she could NEVER do that, no matter how depressed she was feeling, because it is the ultimate selfish act. And it's true - the people left behind will suffer for the rest of their lives.

I'm so sorry for all those people touched by the loss of your dd's friend's brother.

                        Calmama54, from the beautiful


Avatar for cynthiadarlene
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 05-23-2003 - 6:44am
Thanks for the reminder Lynne.

I agree, this is a parents worst nightmare.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Sun, 05-25-2003 - 11:10am
my heart and prayer are with this family! what a nightmare! I guess this is every parent's nightmare...