Paying for college

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2000
Paying for college
61
Fri, 08-03-2007 - 11:14am

Next year at this time we will be sending DD off to college. We are making campus visits, she has taken her ACT test, and has college and scholarship applications on her mind.

My question...how is your student's college bill being paid? H and I have been discussing this for years and now the time is here to make a decision and make it known to DD. We would like to help her, but we don't want college given to her and we don't want her to be overwhelmed with debt when she is finished. We believe she should put tremedous effort into scholarship applications (and have strongly encouraged her to do things that look good on her applications), however, we don't what her hopes dashed if she does not receive a lot of gift money.

DD will not be eligible for federal grants. Any government assistance will come in the form of a $3500 Stafford Loan. We thought we would give her $5000 per year which is about 1/3 of the budget for the school she plans to attend. She would be responsible for the rest through scholarships, working, and her savings. (We are hoping she will not opt for alternative loans or ask us to take out the parent loans).

I'm interested in other thoughts or philosophies on this subject.

Thanks....Julie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2004
Fri, 08-03-2007 - 2:22pm

<<>>

ROFL...
lottery tickets... :-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2005
Fri, 08-03-2007 - 3:50pm

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Respectfully I don't see how having to choose a less expensive school is limiting his experience. There are very few fields of study where what school you attended makes a difference when it comes time to get a job. He will choose the best school for him and his goals and he'll make it work.

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JMO but college isn't a reason to go into debt. Not when you can pay for it in cash, by working hard and taking a little more time to complete your degree. FYI UMass Boston tuition is $6,000 per semester for Ma. residents.. Not $6,000 per year.

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Actually my son knows exactly what he wants to do, he wants to be a pastor. IMO deferments are not an acceptable reason to go into debt, irreguardless of carreer choice. Some people may find that going into debt is an acceptable answer for them.

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I don't anticipate my son will have any difficulty holding down a job, attending school part time (fully paid for) or have issue with living in a small apartment or rented room.

stacy

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2005
Fri, 08-03-2007 - 4:58pm

We are paying for undergrad for each of them, all of it. I think that college is a necessity and I don't want finances to hinder my children's chances at doing well in school. Also, I did not want them starting life with over $100,000 in debt. We expect them to graduate in 4 years(wont pay for more), and if they have to take summer school to complete in that time frame then thats fine. Also, we expect them to do extremely well in school and if they falter they can pay for college themselves.

We did not qualify for need based scholarships so my children did several off of fastweb and got small loans from the schools. They were awarded some scholarships which was helpful but it is not paying the bulk. Stanford is actually paying a large sum, which is good because now instead of paying for a private we are paying like a UC amount. The grandparents have offered to pay for some of it too.

The triplets have been working very hard this summer to earn spending money. The only thing I am not paying for is leisure money. During the school year they will take a small job affiliated with the school.

Stephanie

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Registered: 07-22-2003
Fri, 08-03-2007 - 5:10pm

"There are very few fields of study where what school you attended makes a difference when it comes time to get a job."

Sorry but, I find this to be very untrue. Some schools are known for excellence and if you have your college training at those schools you will certainly be chosen over someone from a less known school. Case in point, my brother went to Rensellier Polytechnic Institute, (spelling may be wrong there, sorry) and he had his pick of jobs. He had good grades from a very well known, very highly respected school. There are people who have had the same degree as he does, but did not get that job, because the employer did not know the school as well.

"I don't anticipate my son will have any difficulty holding down a job, attending school part time (fully paid for) or have issue with living in a small apartment or rented room."

I hope he is extremely intelligent, hard working, very motivated and can live on a shoestring budget. I don't know where you live, but where I live it would be pretty difficult to live on most jobs that an untrained worker can get and pay for an apartment and life incidentals, like food and clothing, no less have to pay for college.

As for my kids, Kelsie is a sr. this year and will most likely be attending a community college to get the basics taken care of, then decide where to go after that. She is not sure what she wants to do with her life. We set up some accounts a long time ago for this purpose so that will be paying part of her expenses. She also has a college acct. that she has put earnings into over the last several years.

I put myself through nursing school, my DH put himself through college and my brother put himself through college. We all had loans and paid them off. We have beautiful homes, families, cars and whatever else we need in life as well as extras. I don't see where having those college loans hurt us in any way. Sure did help us learn to budget our money during school and afterward so we could pay our bills though.

Kristie

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Registered: 09-09-2006
Fri, 08-03-2007 - 5:26pm

I am a little divided on this topic. I personally did not pay for college. I had a large scholarship that covered tuition and my parents paid for the rest. I did pay for graduate school though and that was definately hard. I want to pay for all of it, but it is very expensive especially privates.

We have been lucky so far, I have yet to pay for college yet. Gavin had a full ride scholarship for undergrad and has earned several scholarships for medical school. He took a year off before starting medical school to earn some money and do research. The money that we did not spend on undergrad has been given to him to help pay for medical school. Jacob is going to the Naval Academy, which is free(well despite all the work he has to do).

There are still 3 children who need to go to college and I doubt any of them will be going military or get a full ride. We do not qualify for government financial aid so they will have to do a lot of scholarships. Education wise I prefer private over public schools because of the smaller class sizes and less taught by graduate students but real professors. Also, I went to a private university and loved it. They will get the money from their college fund and I am sure that we will help pay for a majority, if not all of it.

Kate

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Registered: 04-09-2006
Fri, 08-03-2007 - 5:48pm

Before we even had children my husband and I decided to pay for our children's education. We have money saved for their college education because we started shortly after they were born. Since I am paying for it I have a major say in where they go and what they major in. I will not pay $40,000 a year for a university that is unheardof and for some obscure major.

Connor will be a sophomore at UCSB which is a public university. He did not apply to any private universities but we would have still paid if he went to one. He was not eligible for financial aid and recieved a small loan. We expect him to do well in school and we see all of his grades. If he slips or loses focus then he will have to pay. He has to pay for all of his leisure activities and has a flexible job on campus.

Madison will be held to the same standards as her brother. She is a senior this year and is about to start applying to colleges. Most of the schools that she is apply to are private and I am okay with that. She would do better in a school with small class sizes and personal attention. She has already recieved some academic scholarships, which is excellent. She is not applying to Harvard, but if she did and got in I would find a way to finance it.

I want them to go to the best school that they get into and I will find a way to pay for it.

Adelaide

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Registered: 10-06-2010
Fri, 08-03-2007 - 6:40pm

My grandmother paid for my college. My parents saved money as well and it was used to buy me a car and help pay for school expenses but my grandmother told both my brother and I at a young age she would pay for our education. Both my brother and I lived at home during school so we saved on expenses and neither of us had a desire to live on campus.

My grandmother felt that education was important and should not be missed due to money. We could take anything we wanted, we had to live at home or on campus and we needed to maintain a B- average. If we didn't do those things she stopped paying.

I disagree with anyone who says that a free ride to college will make someone appreciate it less. I greatly appreciate what my grandmother did for me. I worked on weekends during college for my fun money/books/ and car expenses and saved to move out when college was done. I also finished college with honors.

I would say that if it is possible give her more money and allow her to focus on grades and school activities. This is the last time in her life she will be fairly "care free". There is tons of time for her to have to work full time and have other responsibilities of life. She should enjoy college and the experience it brings without having to work 25-40 or take 10 years to do it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2007
Fri, 08-03-2007 - 6:40pm

We have triplets leaving for college in 2 weeks. Boys are going to the same school...3hrs away; dd will be about 1 hour away! Both DH and I put ourselves thru school with no parental help.It caused stress and frustration...especially for DH. We decided when the kids were little (2 y/o) that we would save to pay for their education. Every month we had $ taken electronically from checking account and put into mutual funds. We have almost all 4 years covered as of right now. So we now will start planning for graduate school!

We also are working with a financial college planner who set up a smart payment plan for us. It will actually cost us only about 25% more per month than it did to send them to Catholic high school.

Yes the kids applied for tons of scholarships...not many positive results. They will be responsible for their spending money and daily living money.

Your idea sounds fair. Best wishes.

Margie

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Registered: 01-09-2004
Sat, 08-04-2007 - 1:04am
My DD will be a junior this year, so I find this thread very interesting & timely. DH & I have put a little aside for college every month ever since the kids were young so we have money saved, but not enough to pay for 4 years each for 2 kids. However, we expect to get financial aid & at least for DD, are starting to look at private colleges that meet 100% of need. We aren't expecting DD to contribute financially, so her job is to keep her grades up (she's going for an IB diploma), get her volunteer hours in & stay involved in extra-curricular activities - which are things she WANTS to do, not just because they look good on college apps (soccer, NHS, voice lessons, student council, etc.) She had a part-time job for the last 9 months but she just turned in her notice because soccer was starting & she knew (& we agreed) that it would be especially hard trying to hold down a job this year. I figure everything she can do to make herself more attractive to admissions officers will help to get a good financial aid package. I paid for most of my college tuition, but I didn't have the brains that D has so I went to the local U for about $1000 a year!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2005
Sat, 08-04-2007 - 10:59am

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That may have been the case with your brother's employer. In most cases, beyond that first few years following graduation, what it comes down to is what the person is capable of and their actual track record, not what school is printed on the top of a piece of paper. So while the school name may be important in the early years, it doesn't really come into play later in life. High tech jobs, computer science, medicine and law are the most common fields where your degree may make a difference and get your foot in the door. At some point though even they will have to stand on their own merit when looking to change companies. During layoffs, where you went to school doesn't matter much. Cutting costs is cutting costs and a person from RPI or MIT is just as likely to be let go as an engineering student from U. Lowell. (now U. Mass Lowell).

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Dh supported a family (including a very ill toddler..cerebral palsy and severe asthma) on untrained labor wages during the dot com crash. It's not that difficult if you don't have your head in the clouds and choose to live responsibly and within your means. Yeah you have to work hard and go without some luxuries. (cable, nice car etc..) but if you live in an area with good public transportation then it's a very doable thing. Granted he wasn't paying his way through school at that time, but he wasn't just supporting himself either. Traveling to and from Children's in Boston every week wasn't cheap.

I put myself through school and graduated with no student loans at all. I graduated on time (in four years) as I did duel enrollment my senior year of high school and had some of the core college credits out of the way. Yes I worked hard and I didn't have much spending money. I ate well (no Ramen noodles), I went to school and I worked nights and weekends and I babysat when I wasn't working at my job or in class. I also tutored. That work ethic that I learned while working my way through school, carried over to my life afterschool and served me well. Yes it was a state school U. Lowell (*before UMass took over)and I feel that I got a good education. No I couldn't afford a private school, but that has not effected me in a negative way. I value the budgeting lessons I learned during those early years and I feel that they helped me make the most out of dh's unskilled labor wages early in our marriage. It also helped when his high paying senior software engineer job was outsourced to India the same year 4 factories in town shut down. There was no work to be had and dh found no shame in driving a construction truck for a little while. We both left school with solid work ethics, good money sense, no regrets and no school debt.

I just don't see the point in taking on unneccesary debt for any reason. My son needs to go to the school that is the best match for him, not what school offers the biggest "name" play. That may end up being Gordon college.. to the tune of $35,000 per year. or it may be a little school in Michigan that offers him free tuition as a full time-on campus student (costing him only room and board, fees and books). Whatever his choice, I will encourage him not to take on debt that doesn't need to be taken on. Taking on debt you don't need, is just plain irresponsible IMO.

My MIL took years to complete her masters degree. Taking courses at Lesley (sp?) and Harvard. She paid cash and has a top rate degree. She just took a little longer to get it, but was free of all student loans. It is possible to get a top school degree without owing money on it and she didn't allow her desire for no student loans to limit her options in terms of school choice. You just have to accept the concept of it taking a little longer.

It's possible if you are willing to give up a little now, to have more later. More cash in your pocket (as you will have less bills), more freedom in how you spend your money (because you have fewer debts) and more peace of mind knowing you don't owe thousands.

While you may not have found having student loans a burden, most people I talk to do. Especially those who have chosen careers that don't make big money. My son's career choice will not bring him big money.

stacy

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