A peek into b/f's brain....

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
A peek into b/f's brain....
8
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 5:11pm




N and T are friends with a couple who have a stormy relationship to say the least.

Avatar for bookwormmom
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2003
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 7:42pm

Rose, I'm glad you read it too. I know it makes you feel better to know that he thinks this way.


Here's another story along similar lines. Kelsie has a best friend, S who is a wonderful girl, I call her Number 2, as in 2nd daughter. She has been with her boyfriend for 15 months or so. They have been getting closer to having sex but haven't yet (they are both 17 and hs. seniors) S has talked to Kelsie and told her she just isn't quite ready and wants to go slow, bf was moving a little faster. One day bf sent her a text message that said, " I know you aren't ready to have sex, don't worry we can take it slow, I love you and I can wait"

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 8:12pm

I think sometimes seeing abuse makes you swear it is something you will never do.

I know MY grandfather was abusive; my dad was the oldest and he often had to intervene, getting the worst of it himself. He never laid a hand on any of us, even back then when spanking was normal. I never saw my parents argue

His relationship with my mother was special. After he passed, many people told me that my parents were their model for marriage.

And yes, I would consider that to be some pretty deep thought for a 16 yr old!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2007
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 9:18pm

Rose,


He sure does sound like a great kid :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 7:11am

Rose -


I'm so glad T is such a great bf for your dd.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 8:27am
That is really good stuff.

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 1:26pm




The b/f is still in and out of T's mom's life. They're no longer living together, which is definitely best for the kids, but they still socialize and sleep together.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 8:28pm
That IS reassuring, isn't it? And as for the cycle of abuse thing....you know as I do that it usually goes one of two ways: They CAN become abusers, or they can become totally the opposite because they are so conscious of NOT wanting to repeat that cycle. A little off topic, but A. sometimes tells me that he's scared to have children for fear he'll hurt them like he's been hurt, and I always tell him that if he's even worrying about that, then he knows enough to not let it happen. The ones that carry on the abuse are the ones that don't "get" it or realize how wrong it is.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Wed, 09-26-2007 - 7:22am




I've told S the same thing.