Post Surgery Teenager - Ovarian Cancer

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2011
Post Surgery Teenager - Ovarian Cancer
13
Sun, 09-25-2011 - 8:07pm

I'm new here and looked to see if I could find this discussed here previously but I didn't see anything.

Our 14yo daughter was diagnosed with ovarian cancer this summer. Surgery removed a 12# tumor, arby complications that hospitalized her an additional 5 days. This kept her from starting her freshman year on schedule and has created a lot of havoc for her. She's now showing all the signs of depression; sleeping, tears, etc. This weekend has been the worst and we are taking her in for a psych referral (for the depression) in the morning.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2000
Sun, 09-25-2011 - 8:24pm

Many gentle hugs to you. I don't have any btdt experience with a child with a life-threatening disease. You are doing the right thing by getting a psych consult. My very, very un-professional guess is that part of it is just normal 14 year old hormones as far as blaming you for everything; many kids think their parents are the root of all evil from about age 13 til 18 or so... But she obviously has much more to deal with in her life than the typcial bad hair day/that boy didn't say hi to me in the hall/issues of the typical 14 year old. Please keep us posted.

Pam
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2011
Sun, 09-25-2011 - 8:27pm

Yes, the hormones at that age are out of control and after losing an ovary, I'm sure they are even more out of control.

Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Sun, 09-25-2011 - 10:08pm

Well, *I* was a victim of a hit and run that hospitalized me for the last 3 months of school, when I was 11 going on 12.

Avatar for mahopac
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-1997
Sun, 09-25-2011 - 10:17pm

I'm so sorry you are going through this.

My oldest had, at age 4, an ovarian tumor which wrapped itself around her fallopian tube and became gangrenous.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Mon, 09-26-2011 - 2:58pm

I have many family and friends who have had cancer, and they went right back to their routine, continuing to work thru their chemo and radiation.

It is great that they were able to do that, but I also imagine that many other patients are unable to bounce back so quickly. I have never had cancer, but I have certainly seen friends and family who were physically unable to work while undergoing treatment.

As for her school work, there is NO reason she should be falling behind

Again, I respectfully disagree. There are MANY reasons. I would hope that most of them can be worked through, but really - no reason? I haven't gone through anything near what the OP has with her child, but my dd18 missed about 60% of school days the second semester of Freshman year

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Mon, 09-26-2011 - 3:16pm

Has anyone else been through this? Any help, advice, etc., would be greatly appreciated.

I'm sorry to hear this. It sounds like an incredibly rough time for everyone. I'm very glad that you're taking her for counseling, and it doesn't seem surprising that she would be dealing with depression and anger after everything she's gone through. I've never gone through anything like this, but both my dds dealt with some health issues in middle school/high school as well as some traumatic events (death of a sibling and their father-which didn't affect me as much as it was my ex's child and later his death, after we were long divorced).

Everyone handles things differently and my older dd,

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2009
Mon, 09-26-2011 - 7:06pm

Our DDs are 18 and 19, so your story touches me. I know this is very tough for you and her dad, as well as her.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Mon, 09-26-2011 - 8:40pm

Okay, I know you're into tough love and that many kids need it, but you are replying to a woman whose child faced a life-threatening disease.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Mon, 09-26-2011 - 9:02pm

Some of what you are seeing could be related to normal horomonal mood swings, but I picture a really frustrated, angry, tired girl.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2000
Fri, 09-30-2011 - 7:36pm

Thank you ashmama.

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