FWIW, I agree with Jenny and Diamonds....I wouldn't give her any freedom at all for a while until she gradually gains back some trust by showing she can make better decisions. She's only 15.....this doesn't seem to me like just typical 15 y.o. stuff that everybody does. I would be completely overwhelmed if I were in this situation too. She has a long way to go until she's 18, and she has lots of time to improve her judgment and earn your trust well before then.
I know your DD is in counseling, but did she ever have a full evaluation by a psych/neuropsych that would diagnose LDs or emotional diosrders? I bring that up now, cuz if she needs the extra time for studying, tutoring or add'l couseling, you might not want to push the volunteering. Her studies should come first.
The other punishments sound reasonable to me. I would hope the juvenile officer and/or probation officer would consider the fact that she is in counseling, and that you and she are working to improve her behavior. Yes she did wrong, but she could have done much worse at the party, as you've pointed out.
Was it you, or another poster here, who brought up the contract with consequences? This might be a good time to do that if you haven't already done it.
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Hi Kel, delurking to comment here and I hope you dont think I am too strongly wording this:
dfghjk
FWIW, I agree with Jenny and Diamonds....I wouldn't give her any freedom at all for a while until she gradually gains back some trust by showing she can make better decisions. She's only 15.....this doesn't seem to me like just typical 15 y.o. stuff that everybody does. I would be completely overwhelmed if I were in this situation too. She has a long way to go until she's 18, and she has lots of time to improve her judgment and earn your trust well before then.
Kel you will find people who look at punishment on many ends of the spectrum.
FWIW, I also think that pp was rather harsh, but she did warn you.
I know your DD is in counseling, but did she ever have a full evaluation by a psych/neuropsych that would diagnose LDs or emotional diosrders? I bring that up now, cuz if she needs the extra time for studying, tutoring or add'l couseling, you might not want to push the volunteering. Her studies should come first.
The other punishments sound reasonable to me. I would hope the juvenile officer and/or probation officer would consider the fact that she is in counseling, and that you and she are working to improve her behavior. Yes she did wrong, but she could have done much worse at the party, as you've pointed out.
Was it you, or another poster here, who brought up the contract with consequences? This might be a good time to do that if you haven't already done it.
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http://www.pnhp.org/news/2009/october/meet_the_new_health_.php
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQTBYQlQ7yM
The PP was harsh?
n/t
Edited 2/19/2008 4:40 pm ET by heartsandroses2002
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