R Rated Movies?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
R Rated Movies?
22
Wed, 03-08-2006 - 11:50am

Do you, or did you, allow your younger teen (13-14) to watch R rated movies? If so, at what age did you feel they were appropriate? Did you make that decision on just specific movies -- i.e., those that had R ratings because of language or an adult theme as opposed to sexual content?

14yo DD claims she is the only person she knows that is not allowed to watch R movies. It's not that she hasn't seen any, ever, it's that I don't know how ready she is for some of them. If the movie is rated R for language or due to an adult theme, chances are I'll let her watch it. (Most kids hear language that's just as bad at school, so hearing it in a movie is not such a shocker and she is quite aware of the more serious issues around the world today.)

I'm a more conservative with movies that are especially violent, and VERY cautious with movies that are sexually explicit. Not long ago, DD finished a book and told me she had to skip several pages near the end because she 'didn't need to read 4 pages about how the main character lost her virginity'. That indicated to me that she probably wouldn't be comfortable with a movie that contained sexually explicit scenes, either.

Just wondered if I'm a bit too conservative here.

Thanks,
Jules

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-1998
Thu, 03-09-2006 - 8:49am

I'm even more conservative than you--my now-15 year-old didn't even see his first PG-13 movie until he was 12. (It was Pirates of the Caribbean, which I didn't think even deserved a PG-13; we even let my 8-year-old see it.) Matt, who turned 15 back in October, has never seen an R rated movie. Moreover, he has never even ASKED to see an R rated movie. His father and I don't watch them, either, so maybe it's never occured to him.

Elizabeth

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2003
Thu, 03-09-2006 - 10:59am
Nope, sorry - to me restricted adult means restricted adult - especially at age 14. I just started allowng my 17 year old son to view some of the R rated ones and even then I've been careful. Just because they hear it on the school grounds and with their friends doesnt mean I have to condone it in our home.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
Thu, 03-09-2006 - 12:14pm

Thanks everyone. I absolutely don't do scary, slasher or horror movies. At my advanced age, they still tend to interrupt my sleep and my children seem to have inherited that particular trait.

The movies DD wants to see that I'm hesitant about are ones like Cold Mountain, Brokeback Mountain, Constant Gardener ... ones where the theme is a little more mature than movies with a PG-13 rating and a fairly explicit sex scene or two is usually thrown in. When DD was about 12, we were at the video store and she wanted to rent The Pianist because one of her good friends had seen it and said it was good. (I think that's what it was, anyway.) When I saw the R rating, I was shocked that an 12yo was allowed to watch it and needless to say, DD still hasn't seen it.

DH is probably more conservative than I am in this regard. We rented Hotel Rwanda some time ago, DD had discussed the movie and the theme surrounding it in one of her classes and wanted to see it. The whole time, DH was saying 'is this appropriate?', 'I'm not so sure that's a good movie for her to watch', etc. He did the same thing with Constant Gardener a couple weeks ago and I ended up turning it off less than 30 minutes in. At school a few months back, one of the departments showed 'Crash' after school and then led a discussion on racial prejudice, tolerance, etc. but students had to bring a signed permission slip to watch the movie.

Daddio ... I agree with you that some of the PG-13 movies are really questionable in content. I remember watching the re-release of Freaky Friday and being digusted at the level of which the movie glorified teens being rude and disrespectful to each other and was especially disgusted at how twisted the relationship between the girl and her mother was portrayed -- the girl was the one calling the shots in THAT relationship.

And jt ... thankfully, I was alone for my viewing of Sideways and got embarrassed even then. I can't imagine watching it with a 13yo! I still can't see what all the hoopla was over that movie. I just didn't think it was at all funny.

Guess I'll just take this on a case-by-case basis.

Thanks again, for all your input.

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2005
Thu, 03-09-2006 - 1:17pm
I completely agree about Sideways. I kept hearing and reading about how great it was. Dh and I went to see it a the theater and I was expecting a funny, smart comedy. I thought about two seconds of it were funny and the rest was sad and pathetic. And I still laugh about my friends well-intentioned dd trapped in the theater with her twin brothers! Live and learn...
jt
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2004
Sun, 03-12-2006 - 7:22pm
Sideways is a dark comedy. You have to

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2005
Sun, 03-12-2006 - 7:36pm
glad ypu were amused
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2004
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 3:24am

>>I absolutely don't do scary, slasher or horror movies.<<


Those were actually the first R-rated movies that I was allowed to see. I saw Child's Play and Nightmare on Elm Street around age 11. I remember wanting very badly to see The Exorcist and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but wasn't allowed until about 13. I think it should all depend on the particular child in question. If scary/slasher movies disturb your children's sleep, then they clearly aren't ready for them.


I think there are a lot of movies out there that most kids want to see just for the sake of seeing them. My parents used to tell me "It's not the content of the movie that we find objectionable, we just don't think that at your age, you'll be able to understand or appreciate it."

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Registered: 03-06-2006
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 11:16am

Wolverine,

Thanks for your insight. I was somewhere between 14-16 when I managed to get into a movie theatre to see The Exorcist. I had nightmares for MONTHS. Most movies in that genre did that to me and still do actually, so I just don't watch them.

I agree with you on movies like Hotel Rwanda, Schindler's List, Saving Private Ryan, The Patriot etc. DD and I tend to be very keen on US history and for DD especially, it's all enormously fascinating. We visited the Holocaust Museum in WDC last summer and she spent an enormous amount of time walking through the exhibition. DS and I waited for her near the exit for nearly two hours waiting for her to finish. As DS likes to say "she has to read everything down to the last punctuation mark."

I think I let her watch Saving Private Ryan over the summer. She is not upset by it so much as she has a deeper appreciation and understanding of the events -- as in Hotel Rwanda, The Patriot, etc.

Alice in Wonderland was never a big favorite with my kids, and I confess, I never paid attention to it that much, either. My anti-drug message choice for DD was putting a copy of "Go Ask Alice" in her Christmas stocking in 2004. The book made such an impression on her that for an 8th grade writing assignment, a pursuasive essay, she wrote that she felt the book should be required reading for all middle school students.

Thanks again. I appreciate your thoughtful post.

Julie

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2004
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 3:48pm

After reading your post, I took a look at my DVD collection. And you know,

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2000
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 6:47pm

I'm jumping in a bit late here but we've let both of the boys see certain R-rated movies from the time they were preteens.

Pam