Short teenage son
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Short teenage son
| Fri, 04-27-2007 - 11:13am |
I'm concerned for my son. He's 16, went through puberty early (6th grade or so it began). He hasn't grown at all in the last couple of years. He's only 5'6" or MAYBE 5'7". His body is filling out, etc and he's lean and muscular, but he's self consious of his height. Weight 140 or so.
Is he destined to be a short individual (I am 5'3", but his dad is 6'3") or is there the chance he'll grow more later on....my husband says he grew another inch when he was 19 or 20......I think he's fine. He's extrememly handsome (even from a mom's perspective) he's athletic and popular, but I know his height worries him.

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Gorgeous picture, Shels! Thanks for sharing ... all your 'boys' are quite handsome.
Thank you, Jules. I think so too---but when discussing whether or not to post the link, my DH was concerned I was trying to 'brag' about the boys.....so maybe my parental pride in them is showing.
The goal wasn't to brag, but to show especially my older son, and how in my opinion, even if he doesn't grow another centimeter, that he's just great the way he is.......sure he could improve his attitude sometimes, and his AP European History grade, but from a mom's point of view, he's a great guy.
My younger ds13 is proving to be quite the 'big fish' at his middle school too....he began doing the hurdles in 7th grade track this yr and is completely UNDEFEATED. He's so far out in front of the rest of the 7th graders it's AMAZING. He just glides over the hurdles when some others (even on the high school level) look very awkward and lumbering......I hope this is his 'thing'. He's sort of lived in the big world of his older brother..it's great that he's got something all his own to be proud of........not that my oldest is a star or anything, but he's got one of those demanding personalities and when he's around we all know it!! haha
shels
I had to pop in here because one of my pet peeves is how much importance society seems to place on height - especially with men!
I do too! It has been a big deal for him for the last couple of years. He plays football and feels like he can't compete with the really 'big' guys. BUT his coach approached him about attending a kicking camp (he does quite well kicking). With his speed and kicking ability, there is no reason he can't play---even though he isn't as big...even if he doesn't kick...he's fast as ligntning.......but until my MIL started comparing him to my younger son, I haven't really THOUGHT about it----height isnt' the measure of any human being (why are extremely tall women looked at?).
It's a HUGE issue for him and his self esteem. I want to again profess that it isn't a big deal to ME EXCEPT that he is bothered by it, and in turn, I want him to be at ease. He has SO MUCH going for him!
Your comment about relatives complimenting DS on his height kind of struck a nerve with me - I was very early to develop and currently wear a 36D bra - was in a B by the time I was 12 - and the aunts all had to comment on it. How dumb you can get, like I did anything to enhance my development - it's actually a lot "their" doing than mine - my mother is very flat chested, but my dad's sisters have both had major reduction surgery due to back problems.
Sometimes I think relatives just need to mind their own business a little more. One of my nephews always had a hearty appetite as a toddler, though he wasn't overweight. Everyone thought it was quite the sign of "manhood" - the amount of food he could put away for his size, and as he got older he got more and more proud of the amount of food he could eat - and ate more and more. He's currently 25 y/o, 6' tall, and weights 375 lbs. He can barely climb a flight of stairs without getting completely winded, can't tie his own shoes coz he can't reach them, and has to special order most of his clothes. Thank goodness his current g/f is pretty health conscious, only cooks/buys healthy food, and insists that he go for walks with her every evening. He's lost a noticable amount of weight since they've been together (8 months) so I'm hoping he can develop healthier habits that will last the rest of his life, because I'm afraid his life is going to be very short if he doesn't change his ways. And if only the relatives could have shut their mouths BEFORE his weight got out of control!!
Rose
I know, Rose. Family input is the WORST. How can these people that profess to love you so much make it SUCH a point to bring out things that could potentially make someone self consious!
Like you, I developed early and although overweight now, I wasn't as a teen, so my
'c' cup on a 100 lb frame caught ALOT of unwanted attention---grandmas and aunts were the FIRST to comment (well, second, next to teenage boys). I now wear DD, but obviously that's some from weight gain, and isn't AS noticeable as it would be on a smaller person, but it still draws comments now and again......from smaller busted friends mostly-----I realize there are ALL sorts of body image issues, but sheesh.......why bring up the very things that we KNOW are triggers of self consiousness in our society? Why should it matter that I'm a DD and she's a small B (her terminology, not mine)? Each comes with it's own set of issues (real or perceived)....same with height......who really cares? WE are who we are, and it is up to us to be happy with ourselves as PEOPLE....not tall people, or normal bust size people, or straight haired people or WHATEVER gets people going, you know?
And I do not have the guts to tell my MIL face to face to shut up.........I'm a chicken!!
Shels ... there are some days I am so proud of my kiddos (for no particular reason) that I feel like I will bust right open. So! Show your parental pride all you want.
C is taking that AP Euro class too and man, is that a doozy. I can't wait for it to be over and done and (yaaaay!) the exam is next Friday. Hopefully, C can breathe again.
I'm confess I am a bit obsessive over my DS' height -- I got that way during his chubby years, and it stemmed from me worrying about his weight and whether or not a growth spurt would take care of it ... OR, would his weight be something to worry about all the rest of his life. Once that growth spurt hit, however, W seemed to stop eating almost completely. It was very worrisome! He started complaining of headaches, fatigue, dizziness, etc., and I pretty much had to force him to eat. He 'claimed' he was just not hungry, but when I think back onto things he said and did, I believe he was very deliberately NOT eating. At one point, C even said to me, 'have you noticed how skinny he is?'. Although he hasn't seemed to return to his old eating habits, he still eats far less that what I think is normal for a teenage boy. But I digress ...
And congrats on your younger DS too! How awesome that he found his niche and somewhere he can shine. You have every reason to be proud!
I don't have a son but I do remember my boss telling me that his oldest son was short in the beginning of high school and then in his junior year he had a major growth spurt. His ds is now 6'2". So I would definitely give it some time...you may be surprised to find that all of sudden he'll shoot up.
Plus my dd is 5'7" and is dating a nice young man who is the same height or maybe even 5'6". She doesn't care...she's thinks he's wonderful.
Has he been seen by an endocrinologist? If not I would strongly urge you to get him in to see one. They can do some simple tests (xrays) to determine if his growth plates have fused yet. If they have then he won't grow anymore, if they haven't then he will continue to grow a bit.
My son also had what is termed precosious puberty but he had been under the care of an endocrinologist from the time he was 7 years old (onset of pubic hair). I am 5'1" and my dh is 5'11". Based on our height alone the doctors said our son should be around 5'9" and 5'10". Because of the early onset of puberty and his growth plates closing more rapidly (x-rays show him to be almost 16 right now and he's only 13)we are looking at a adult height range of 5'6"-5'8. Currently he's 5'4 1/2" at 13 1/2 years old.
stacy
I just wanted to point out that it goes both ways with these boys...
My DS-18 has always been uncomfortable with his height. He was 6 foot by the time he was 13, and is now 6'4". He tells me he's too tall. And he truly believes this. His teachers would tell me he slouches and refuses to stand up to his full height. He's been teased in the past, it was especially bad 3 and 4 years ago.
Hopefully all our boys will one day be comfortable with the height God gives them.
zz
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