Should I Pay?
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| Mon, 09-25-2006 - 12:46pm |
This is a small thing, but wwyd? Some of you know that dd14 was depressed last year, well she seems to have come out of her funk (still got teen attitude, don't get me wrong) and isn't wearing black much anymore. She also wants to dye her very black dyed hair back to its original brown color. Unfortunately, the only way to do this is to pay what will probably come to $130 to bleach it (only way to get black out) and then dye it brown. Normally, I would say "gee honey, I guess you've learned a valuable lesson. Let me know when you've saved up enough money." But speaking of picture day, it's coming up and I myself would sincerely love a picture of her with her natural color. So I'm sorely tempted to pay for it myself.
Yesterday after food shopping with me she suggested, "mom, if we don't buy food for one week you can afford to get my hair dyed." Thing is, her brothers have gotten used to eating. I can come up with the cash, I know, but what will that teach her? I can also have her meet me halfway by paying for part of it out of her allowance. Any other suggestions? We don't have much time - picture day is October 2nd.

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I think I'd be of your opinion to pay for it for her to encourage her more appropriate behavior trend.
Could you front her the money in exchange for some future chores around the house?
I'm glad she's more pleasant to be with and seems happier.
Well, this sounds like progress! If it were me, I'd probably go ahead and pay to have it done. You know it's going to look particularly nasty during the growing out phase if she has to go that route, and worse if it doesn't get done properly via an experienced person.
I like the idea of having her work off part of the expense with chores, and since you've got a major painting job underway, why not let her help?
It sounds like things with your DD are improving -- I'm happy for you!
I expect most moms here would say either she pays for all of it or you split it but honestly if it were me, I would pay for all of it before she had a chance to change her mind.
I'm a new lurker on this board and like you, I'd normally have her chip in.. However, I say take her out of school, pay for it and make a day of it! What a wonderful way to celebrate her 'coming out of her depression'! Heck..take her to the mall for a new outfit for her debut at school as her new, wonderful self! Give her all the positive reinforcement you can!
Denise
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