Son is struggling

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2007
Son is struggling
4
Tue, 09-14-2010 - 8:24am
My ds17 started college in July almost 400 miles from home they have no dorms since it is a technical college so he is renting a room in a house owned by the college across the street from the college. He has never been away from home and is struggling he has stated a long list of complaints about the house and the college so we are just trying to encourage him telling him that it will be worth it in the long run. He made a comment on facebook that said he wished he could turn back time and never went but he started it so has to finish it. I am worried about him but hope that if we just keep encouraging him he will be ok. Any thoughts or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2010
In reply to: dajeha
Tue, 09-14-2010 - 9:50am

Bless his heart, it sounds like he has a case of home sickness! Especially if he has never been away from your home as you said..everything is unfamiliar and it takes time to find a routine and get used to his new surroundings and he has only been there since July? I would keep up with the encouragement and if possible send him a "care package" from home if this is possible. If there are certain

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
In reply to: dajeha
Tue, 09-14-2010 - 12:06pm
How long is the program that he's in? Do you think any of the complaints that he said about the school could really be valid? Maybe this actually isn't the program for him--you know there are kids who start out in one college and transfer after a year and end up liking the 2nd college much better. It's hard to know. I also think it's difficult since he's not in a typical dorm atmosphere which is where most college students make friends. I mean how many kids are really away from home before they go to college unless it's like a week at camp?
Community Leader
Registered: 06-27-2006
In reply to: dajeha
Tue, 09-14-2010 - 12:49pm
I agree, it could be just a good old-fashion home-sickness. He hasn't been away from home and doesn't know if he likes it. Does his room have comforts of home? If not, maybe send his pillow case from home. Just small things like that may make him feel at home. He is in a strange house in a strange town.





iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2007
In reply to: dajeha
Tue, 09-14-2010 - 3:18pm
Thank you everyone for the encouraging words. His program is only 18 months he will finish in Dec of 2011. He is in a house with 5 other guys and 1 girl. He seems to get along with them all for the most part I agree it seems to be homesickness and he is coming home for the weekend so maybe that will help. The house he is in is an older house and his room is tiny so that could be part of it. when he moved in they had said that they would have a washer and dryer hooked up within a week and it took them almost 6 weeks to get them and just now got them hooked up but the dryer wasn't working right so he still ended up at laundromat which frustrated him because he is one if you tell him something is going to be done he thinks it should be which is only right and there are other things but I think as one of you said he probably was exaggerating a little on FB and of course his sister26 whom is very protective of him read it and was alarmed. He was with one of the other guys when I called him back (he called me a little while ago so I called him back for him to tell me he was going to Walmart a little later for some Pepsi LOL) So hopefully he can find things to do in the mean time to keep him busy. He does have a lot of extra time on his hands since he doesn't really get homework its more hands on. He is planning on getting a job after the first of the year but we wanted him to wait til after he turns 18 Oct 28 don't know Ohio laws about teens working and just figure it would be better if he waited so he would be able to come home for Holidays instead of having to work it. Thanks again everyone.