The teacher took her cel phone!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2007
The teacher took her cel phone!
27
Thu, 08-30-2007 - 1:00pm

Yes, she has been warned, no texting at school, no texting while driving. I will be checking! Don't know about the driving, but DD 16 had her cel phone confiscated this morning for texting in class. DH went to the school to retrieve the phone, and he is mad.

Now in the grand scheme of things, I know this is small potatoes. She is basically a good kid, and pretty responsible. She gets good grades, dances 3-4 evenings a week, and is working part time to pay for a spring break school trip to Paris and Italy. Her car is old (1981 Mercedes) and she drives about 25 minutes to a Performing Arts charter school, so she MUST have a phone. For my peace of mind, if nothing else.

My first reaction is to cancel the text messaging, and block it. Does that seem reasonable? The texting is new, but got quickly out of hand. I would say that before this summer and the PT job, she had very little social life. Her school is very small, the kids live all over the place, and there are very few boys. All of the sudden she is going out with boys, and they all seem to communicate exclusively by text. I am glad she is going out, I think she needs some practice with it before college! And I can't believe that if they can't reach her by text, they won't call.

So, my question. Is cancelling texting an overreaction to one phone confiscation? Her Dad is livid, so I'm sure some scolding will be involved. He wants to take the phone away completely, but we need a compromise here.

She is supposed to go bowling with a group tonight, and is meeting a boy for a movie on Sunday. She can't go out without her phone, my rules.

As you can tell, I am not experienced at this! She is my only child, and has been very little trouble up to now.

Diana

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2003
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 3:36pm

Be careful...All cell phones have the ability to text. It's whether or not you have a plan and how many texts the plan covers. Our initial plan covered 1,000 texts per month and my daughter still went over. I switched to unlimited for a few dollars more. It wasn't worth the grief and the hours pouring over the bill to find the charges.

She can still text on your phone!!

Avatar for mjaye2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 4:10pm
I know I had texting removed from our phones. We can't send OR receive texts. What I *don't* know if that is available on a "by phone" basis--in other words, can you cancel texting on one phone in a plan and allow it on the other phones in the same plan. It probably depends on the carrier. Maybe she has a different plan/carrier for her phone than what her dd has.
Avatar for mjaye2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 4:40pm

I know I never needed a cell phone or text messaging to get me to cut class for any reason. :) If I wanted to cut class, I did. If I wanted to meet up with my boyfriend, we'd either plan it the night before or in the morning before class, or even at lunch. Not saying it's right, just saying that cell phone texting is not *necessarily* the culprit for a kid cutting class.

I personally was always concerned about my kids texting during class because I was afraid they would cheat on a test. (Just one reason for me to have cancelled texting on all our phones--besides the fact that they shouldn't be on the phone in class anyway.)

I certainly don't mind my kid's cell being taken for the day...and I actually *like* the idea of a kid having to do something extra for the school to earn it back, I just hate the requirement of the parent having to go in during school hours and fork over $20, plus the kid serving a detention, the 1st time my kid forgets and leaves his cell phone in his pocket (fyi--he wasn't even using it, he just had it in his pocket).

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 8:31pm
that's pretty strict! They have to pay to get it back? Wow! As for the cell phone in the pocket....we dont' have a really strong policy on the darn things, so I aways tell the kids that as long as I don't SEE it I'll just pretend it doesn't exist. It's amazing how outrageous they can get, though - one day last year I was giving them there weekly "progress report". Kayla was not there that day. Suddenly Nikki is at my desk saying..."Can you please give me Kayla's mark? I'm texting with her right now!" LOL - this is the same kid whose mom will arrive before lunch time to pick her up and PHONE HER CELL PHONE to tell her she's in the parking lot!
Avatar for mjaye2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 9:35pm

LOL! That's funny about the mom. Now, I will admit, I'm pretty lazy, so I have, on occasion, called ds from various and sundry parking lots if he isn't outside waiting on me to come out, so I don't have to park, or pay to get in, or the weather is crappy, or I'm not dressed for "public veiwing" (ROFL), but *never* while he is in school! OMG, now that's carrying it a little too far! LOL

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2007
Sat, 09-01-2007 - 12:34am
I wouldn't take away her texting priveleges--permanently at least. My dd who is almost 15 texts a lot. She too is limited socially--and this is their way of reaching out socially. Clearly, it can get out of control and be a crutch and be addictive. So can food! but I don't think we should throw out the baby with the bath water. I am so grateful my daughter texts me for safety reason. The phone can't be ringing everywhere. She texts me and lets me know where she is seated in a movie theatre--or other information about her whereabouts. Also, some teens say e-mail is soosoodead. texting is their way of communicating. My daughter got out of bounds texting. She left for summer camp though--which provided a basicallly tecnology/electronic free setting. It was great! Now, she has it under control. If she ever texted in school though, I would definitely find that totally UNACCEPTABLE!!!!! If her behavior is otherwise not out of line, I would delve deeper in to why texting is so important. In our case, it made up for a deficiency in the social scene. So, we really worked on improving that!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Sun, 09-02-2007 - 11:21pm

She leaves it in the car - or shuts it off during school hours - your rule. If she has it taken again absolutely remove texting ability.

Courtney

There's a great big beautiful tomorrow shining at the end of every day... there's a great big beautiful tom

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