Teen son & 40+ female online relationshi
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|Wed, 07-28-2010 - 12:15am|
I am very new here and I come with a very heavy heart. My story is long and complicated but I will try and keep it short.
My son has been involved in a very inappropriate online relationship with a much older woman for several years. It started when he was only 15 and up until just last Christmas he was hiding the entire thing from us. He ran away with this woman last Christmas (he was only 16) and he was missing for two days until the police located them and brought my son back to us.
The woman was arrested charged for online solicitation, but recently the charges were dropped because there was no concrete evidence that she "knew" his age. She said she thought all along he was 20, and he said thats what he told her.
The last six months have been a living nightmare for my son, myself and our entire family. He was not allowed to contact her the entire time, nor was she permitted to contact him or any of his family. Naturally, my son blamed the entire thing, including her arrest on me... he said if I hadnt reported him missing, this would never have happened.
I have been doing everything in my power to try and repair the damage that this woman has done, trying to rebuild some kind of love and trust between my son and I.... but its a daily struggle.
Now that she is "off the hook"... she is back in touch with my son (now 17). My husband and I feel as if we are between a rock and a hard place. If we "put our foot down" and tell him no internet, no contact... we feel that he will just run... and end up miles away... in another country... with this sick woman. But on the other hand if we allow him to keep doing what he is doing (up all hours of the night chatting with her and neglecting all other aspects of his life, including school and higene) he will just continue to take full advantage of our kindness... all while stabbing us in the back and claiming that we are so "hard on him" and "he cant live with us"...
We are all in counselling.. but the problem we are encountering is... my son is over 16 and where we live.. that means he is protected by privacy laws... his counsellor cannot share anything with us... without my sons consent.