Teen spending habits?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Teen spending habits?
30
Mon, 07-17-2006 - 1:46pm
How much do you attempt to influence how your kids spend their own money? My 15 year old has had a job for a little over a month. He really wastes his money (in my opinion). Most of it goes to DVD's and video games. On Thursday, he got a $489 paycheque - and then later in the day he got a $400 government rebate cheque that everyone in the province got. It was ALL gone by 6:00. He spent $30 on a birthday present for my 7 year old DD, bought a new DVD player for about $100, spent a little on fast food -and ALL the rest on games and movies. On the one hand this is terrible financial management, and I'm trying (unsuccessfully) to encourage him to make better choices. On the other hand - it IS his money, so I don't know how far to push that!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 07-20-2006 - 1:43pm
Yes, I worry about the future! This kid has a $58,000 trust fund that he gets the minute he turns 18, and if recent spending is any indication I can absolutely see him blowing it in no time flat. I've decided that I'll have to insiste he bank half his paycheque - I was torn because it is "his" money, but having a job when you are a teenager is a privilege, not a right. Thanks for the feedback, everyone! I know I have to pick my battles very carefully with him, so I wanted to be sure about my own thinking before I do it ;-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 07-20-2006 - 1:52pm
Here's some free legal advice. I assume you are in Canda from the way you spell cheque, but there's probably something similar. $58,000 is a lot of money if you think someone will blow it right away. Even though your son is 18, if he has a history of not being able to control himself when it comes to money, plus other issues, you might be able to apply for a conservatorship. It's like legal guardianship, but it's just over the money, not the person. It can be used where someone can't be trusted not to waste their money (for ex. a gambling problem, etc.) no matter how old they are. You would have to consult a lawyer where you live to see if this could pertain to your situation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 07-20-2006 - 8:57pm
Thanks for the advice, and good catch on the location! ;-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2005
Fri, 07-21-2006 - 9:20am

My son is younger, going to be 13 in a couple of months, so his income and purchasing needs are different than the teen mentioned in the OP.

At the moment he's tithes around 10% of his allowance and 50% of gift money. He is required to make all purchases outside of needs. That means birthday gifts, Christmas gifts, cell phone, comic books, movies,hair cuts etc.. all have to come out of his pocket. His allowance is given monthly so he has to budget carefully. He also has to set priorities: Tithe, Hair cut, cell phone and gifts first, whatever is left over he can do with as he wishes. We don't required him to set aside as savings, but he usually does save money for things that come up unexpectedly or for things that he wishes to purchase but doesn't have enough money as yet to do so.

In addition to his regular allowance he recieves a clothing allowance. He is given a list of items that he needs each season and next to each item is where I found it and at what price. If he wishes to have a major brand such as Gap or wants a fashion color Levi instead of the basic jean etc.. then he has to come up with the price difference between the two. So if I alloted him $20 for a hooded sweatshirt and he wants the $38 one from Gap, he needs to save up $18 of his own money to get the Gap Hoodie. Or he has to find sales and deals on other items in order to "find" the difference within his own clothing budget.

We do not purchase wants outside of Birthday and Christmas and then the gifts are limited to one gift for his birthday and three gifts maximum for Christmas. (dependant upon cost).

When he has a job he will no longer recieve an allowance from us. He will be required to purchase all his own clothes, car insurance, gas, entertainment, gift giving and save money for college. We are not paying for his college tuition. We expect that he will continue to tithe.

stacy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 07-21-2006 - 11:41am
wow - in my opinion that is quite harsh! Of course you didn't say how much he gets for allowance, so it might be a lot more than my kids get, but mine would never be able to supply all those needs on their own. For instance, I would consider haircuts to be a "need", not a "privilege" so I wouldn't make my kids pay for their own (unless my girls want to do something "fancy" like dyeing or perming). Just curious - would you mind if he decided to save his money by NOT getting his haircut and letting it grow out instead? Also - I LIKE buying my kids some stuff that would make them happy between birthdays - I just spent $100 on a sewing machine for my oldest because I know she'll make good use of it, and it was fun to see how thriled she was! She's very responsible with money and a very good saver -between fundraising and savings she managed to fund her own $750 fee for a Girl Guide trip this summer, so I don't feel that helping her out on occasion when I can afford it is hurting her any.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 07-21-2006 - 2:48pm
ummm....just to moderate my postiong slightly, I realize that "harsh" carries a negative connotation I didn't intend ;-) Your money rules are certainly a lot stricter that what I'd do, but I don't mean to sound critical if it works for your family ;-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
Fri, 07-21-2006 - 2:59pm

Wow ... I tend to agree with mom2morgan ... this seems a pretty heavy burden for a 12yo person to try and manage those kids of finances. Your DS must be a pretty mature and independent 12yo to handle that kind of responsibility.

I don't know if I am impressed or if I feel your son is being forced to grow up a little faster than he may be ready to. Obviously, every child needs to learn to manage money and finances, but I do have mixed emotions on your approach.

How does he feel about the forced tithing? Tithing 50% of his gift money is an awful lot. And you expect him to continue to tithe but don't expect to help him out with college tuition? And all financial assistance stops when he gets his first job? Wow ...

I'm guessing he's going to have to go to work full-time as soon as he graduates high school so he can support himself.

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2003
Fri, 07-21-2006 - 4:02pm

When I was a working teen my mother compelled me to save a large percentage of my paycheques. The full paycheque went into a savings account and I was allowed to spend only a small portion of it. Before I made any significant purchases I was to discuss them with her and she sometimes either helped me out with the purchase or made a suggestion or whatever. By the time I was in my early 20s I had managed to save over $20K but still use my own money to pay for tuition, books and miscelleneous purchases over the years.

Did that teach me to manage my money? Well, it made me AWARE of money but to this day I am a poor financial planner unfortunately.... I am deep in debt mainly due to some very unusual circumstances in my life but also due to the fact that I like nice things and I like having a good time and these things cost money....

But I am glad at least at THAT point in my life I was in pretty good shape so I'd say talk to your son about a similar savings plan.

Avatar for heartsandroses2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 07-21-2006 - 4:06pm

Ditto what hydrangea said - it sounds extremely burdensome for such a young boy.

Is it customary to tithe more than 10%? Fifty percent sounds like a lot (and just a little unfair to me). If he's going to be titheing almost everying he gets or earns, when WILL he be able to save for college? It seems to me, and pardon me if I offend you (not my intention), that you're basically setting him up NOT to attend college after HS. I can't see how he can possible afford it.

This is in your profile: "What I would most like to accomplish sometime in my life:
To help my son grow to be a man worth knowing."

That is a very admirable goal, but shouldn't he get to be a kid first? I'm all for teaching responsibilities, as my kids certainly pay thier way and have for a long time, but it just seems too strict for so young. I pay for haircuts and we compromise on clothing. I certainly don't buy all named brand clothing, but I will if it's incredible marked down or on sale at Marshalls. My dd's and I will both chip in if they want anything more than a trim, say, a perm or color. They each get an allowance towards only thier closest friends at Christmas. We helped our oldest dd buy her car and she is on our insurance, but she contributes to that as well. I have to admit, we probably overdo it at Christmas, but we've slowed way down in recent years as we head closer to the college years. And for birthdays we're relatively on the same page as you - but we do have a bid party and lots of cake!

I don't mean to pick your plan all to bits; I'm just amazed that your son hasn't shown any resentment at being forced to tithe that portion of his money and just goes along with this without question. But then, he is still relatively young.

Avatar for heartsandroses2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 07-21-2006 - 4:13pm

You reminded me of when I was a working teen. I had to give my mother 50% of everything I made. She said I was paying rent, essentially, contributing to the household needs. I didn't really question it too much, as I knew that my one older sister did this as did my brother. The difference was that they were out of HS and I wasn't.

Anyway, flash forward a few years and I was shopping for my first apt - my parents were retiring far from 'home' and I would be on my own. I found a place and my mother miraculously came up with my deposit and first 2 months rent, furnished the apt, had my dad fix up a kitchen nook and bought me all the little things I'd need, even some decorations. I was astounded because it didn't seem like she ever had money. Turns out that all the money I had given her, less the auto insurance money, she had put aside for this very moment. Since I didn't go to college, she helped set me up in my own place.

So, she was teaching me how to be responsbile for meeting my needs and paying my bills, but really she was saving it for me. I do that with my oldest dd as well and when she goes away to college she will find out but not a day sooner.