Weekend Negotiations

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2006
Weekend Negotiations
11
Tue, 10-17-2006 - 7:57am

I have come to dread the weekends in my house. It seems that every weekend is full of negotiations. DH and I wait for what 17yo DD will ask to do and then the negotiations begin.


She has made some bad choices in the past and several weeks ago had a major car accident (she was not hurt). Lately she seems to be working on being more responsible - she is handling school better than ever (she's a senior so this is really a little late) and just got a new job.


As far as her social life goes, I never know how much freedom I should give her. We don't let her stay out late, but don't have a curfew that's set in stone - we set a curfew depending on where she is and what she's doing. Since the accident, we don't like her driving home much after 11PM.


There are often parties on the weekends - or rather, kids hanging out at someone's house. I don't usually know the kids (we have a very large school district - 2 towns), and don't call to see if parents are home. You never know if they will be home and even if they are, if they supervise the goings on in their house. She also asks for sleepovers at girlfriends' houses. Not comfortable with this - now that she has a car, how do I know where she really is.


Does anyone out there have a very social child? What does your teen like to do? What do you allow? What do you NOT allow? What are your curfews?


Just curious - thanks for any input!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2003
Thu, 10-19-2006 - 9:45am
I agree about our generation seeming to know so much more regarding what's going on in our teenagers lives. Let's face it, we went to parties too growing up and probably made a few bad choices. Many of us said, thought, did things that would turn our parents' faces beet red! You have to at least try to trust them and have faith that the values we instill in them will eventually kick in. But let's face it, they're teenagers, not adults (although I know adults who's behavior would put teens to shame). Still, that doesn't stop me with having my daughters kiss me goodnight each and every night. I want to look into their eyes and smell their clothing when they return home...:>)

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