What do you do when your teen is sick?
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What do you do when your teen is sick?
| Wed, 11-08-2006 - 7:59am |
My dd(15) didn't go to school because she didn't feel well. No fever, just doesn't feel well. I have had a long standing rule that if you don't go to school, no phone, no computer, no friends and you must stay home unless going to the dr. You may watch tv, read and relax. Is that too harsh now that she's getting older? She's a honor roll student and usually only misses a few days a year. My original theory was it would cut out "mental health" days. Just wondering what every one does.

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I really don't get this. If you were sick enough to stay home from work, would you actually stay in your bed all day not doing anything? I know I wouldn't. At least lying down on the couch watching TV makes the day go by. Sometimes when my son's allergies are acting up, his eyes are watery and itchy and he doesn't want to read, which is very unlike him. I can't see punishing kids who are actually sick.
Also , what about finishing their homework or doing something they have to do for school? At least that would be a productive use of their time.
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Actually yes. The only time I miss work is if I'm vomiting or I have a fever. At which point I don't want to do much more than just lay in bed anyway.
<< Sometimes when my son's allergies are acting up, his eyes are watery and itchy and he doesn't want to read, which is very unlike him. I can't see punishing kids who are actually sick.>>
Alergies acting up is not IMO a reason to stay home from school. In the real world you can't afford to miss work each time your allergies act up. Yes my son has missed school a couple of times due to his bronchial asthma and needing breathing treatments every few hours and constant monitoring. At which point all he wanted to do was lay on his bed and try to sleep because his coughing and difficulty breathing kept him up most of the night.
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A productive use of time is to stay in bed and rest. If my child is well enough to be clearly focusing on school work, then he should have been in school.
That said: If he's home for a reason other than being very ill (ie.. mid-day doctors appointment and no point in him returning to school for the last hour and a half of the day.. then yes, he needs to be doing things for school. But I try very hard to minimized
missing school for doctor/dentist and orthodontist appointments.
JMO
stacy
Well, I guess I am more cautious about my son's allergies & asthma because I have had too many trips to the ER, usually in the middle of the night, which means me taking time off from work for subsequent dr's appts. He has been seeing an allergy specialist for the past couple of years. He's on daily medication and the allergist suggested having him take a series of injections. I am really trying to avoid this because it's weekly shots for 4-6 mos. I am putting that in as a last resort. So yes, I have some seasonal allergies and I just take a pill & go to work, but my son's allergies are a lot more severe, plus I am not worried about him missing work since he's an A student. His reading assignment is to read 1.5 hrs. a week. Sometimes he will read that much in a day. Since the beginning of school, he has already read the Harry Potter 5 & 6 books. So he's not a kid who will be faking it to stay home from school. Now he's feeling better today and they have the day off because of the holiday.
As far as the "real world" my DH & I hardly ever miss work due to being sick because we are very conscientious. I'm pretty lucky as far as my health goes too, so I have maybe one sick day a year. Plus I have a job where if I'm sick, noone else is going to do my work. On the other hand, my ex works for the post office. If he doesn't go to work, someone else will sort the mail--they aren't going to leave it for the next day. I don't know how many sick days he gets, but he calls in sick all the time when he isn't really sick. Then when he is sick, he has no more paid sick days. We have been divorced for 10 yrs. and he's still doing that, even though he is 47 years old. This summer he broke his hand playing softball and he couldn't go to work for a few weeks because he couldn't lift the big sacks of mail. I had to speak to him because he got behind in child support, which he then paid up, but I said "don't you have sick days?" and his response was "you know me." Some people never grow up.
This is an interesting thread with surprisingly varied responses.
I'm not sure if our high school is unique in this regard, but missing and late work will put an otherwise excellent grade right in the toilet.
So by high school my kids have fortunately (and finally!) figured out that missing school, for legitimate or non-legitimate reasons, has a price. While I'm gone they could lay in bed all day nursing their colds and flu or they might cozy up on the sofa with popcorn and movies... I really don't care.
But as soon as school gets out they need to get on the phone to their friends in all of their classes and get the homework assignments, e-mail their teachers, check was was covered that day, plead for an extension and get the work done.
It's just not worth faking it or skipping for a so called "mental health day." It's not very relaxing being behind the eight ball. In fact, most of their rare sick days I had to insist they stay home against their wishes.
To answer your question, yes I think it might be too harsh now that she's a freshman and an honor roll student who is not having motivational problems.
I always make him put on some fresh clothes. That could be clean pajamas if he wishes. It all depends on how bad he's feeling, if he's achy (at which point he'd rather have the pj's) etc.. Usually he'll just put on jeans, a T shirt and his bath robe.
I'm sure that my son does get up from time to time. Just to move around a bit, get a glass of juice or water, sit on the couch and pat the cat or read. I mean he's not going to get grounded for sitting up on the couch and reading. But as a general rule if he's running a fever and such then the best place for him is in bed. I do not insist that he lay down all day (even hospital patience recovering are encouraged to sit up in a chair a few times a day) but when I'm not home I would rather he be in bed.
stacy
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