Worried - daughter's secret e-mail?
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Worried - daughter's secret e-mail?
| Wed, 09-05-2007 - 6:54pm |
This has me worried. I have a 13-year old, she's a good kid but like all kids is very immature and naive. We have always checked over their e-mail but lately one e-mail account in particular has become very inactive, yet she still spends the same amount of time online. DH & I are worried she might be using an e-mail account we don't know exists - she has some friends who are pretty sharp on the computer, one who's a bit too grown up for her years. Some upsetting e-mails were coming in lately and we'd like to find out somehow if there are any SECRET e-mail accounts on this computer we don't know are there. We are strapped tight for money, just scraping by, so I can't afford some of the programs I've read you can put on your computer. Is there a way to do this???

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The thing is that there are so many places that you can get e-mail accounts that they can get them very easily. I know I have our regular one that comes right into the computer and holds 3 different addresses. I also have one that is a Hotmail addy that I got when I ordered something for a gift and I didn't want anyone to see the e-mails coming in about it. We also have one on Verizon and my kids have them on some remote sites too. There are a lot of free ones out there.
Have you asked her about what her e-mail addy is and why she isn't getting many e-mails any more? My dd doesn't get hardly any e-mails, because she does a lot of text messaging and IMing. Consequently when she got those going she dropped the number of e-mails tremendously, she also gets messages on her My Space. That could be what is going on too.
I'd ask her about it and see what she has to say. She may not have any secrets to hide at all. You never know.
Kristie
~~joannaran~~
Do you see ANY history at all when you look at history or at the address bar? Because if you do then she isn't erasing history. It is very difficult for someone to just erase one or two selective web sites from an entire list of history. I am very tech savvy and could not tell you how to do that.
If you are really, REALLY suspicious and concerned, buy a "keylogger". "Keyloggers" are security software that you install on your machine which logs every keystroke enterred by users and which they do not know even exists on the machine. You review the information yourself by enterring a specific password or combination of keys. Look it up online or go to a local "spy" store. Its been used alot for these purposes but mostly for spouses to catch cheating husbands/wives emailing their lovers!! (LOL)
But let me ask you a question, why are you concerned? Why do you not trust your daughter? Is the computer not in an area of the house where you can supervise what she is doing? Is she using the computer off hours when you aren't around? What do you believe she may be doing? Has she given you reason to suspect her?
Not trying to be officious here. My only point is that browser history is not really a very good indicator of what's actually going on with your teens and computers. It seems that if a teen wants to hide something from you on the computer, they are generally quite adept at doing so.
I agree with diamondslb; a key logger is a drastic step. First, I'd try allowing her computer use only during times when you're around. Sever the connection if you know how, or simply take the router or modem when you're not there. Hover and frequently pop in unexpectedly. If she freaks and switches or closes screens when you appear, insist on seeing what's there before she has a chance to delete it. Based on her behavior, you should be able to tell if there's an issue.
I think Daddioe gave you some really good advice. I used to do that to my dd, walk in and she would shrink a window, it was usually that she just wanted her privacy. She finally learned that if she shrunk it down I would be insistant on seeing it, if she didn't I usually just walked on.
But do have a talk with her about internet safety. You are right that you can't be too safe with the things that are going on these days.
Kristie
Even if your daughter deletes the history chances are she hasn't had time to delete the temp internet files.
~~joannaran~~
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