I definitely agree that she should try speaking to the teacher first. Does the teacher have after-school help hours, or can your dd arrange to meet her to go over her homework with her? Her problems remind me a lot of the struggle my ds had with his science teacher in 6th grade. She was a stickler for rules like "homework must always be done in blue ink" and "homework must be done on a separate piece of paper." In his mind, these were minor details which he often forgot, but she would take points off every time. I'd see him sitting there obviously working hard on the assignments, but his homework grades weren't reflective of that effort. It was frustrating, but he finally just had to accept the fact that she wanted things done a certain way, and he had to comply if he wanted to pull his grades up. Maybe if your dd sat down with the teacher and went over some of the past homework assignments with her, she could get a better understanding of where she's losing points.
But to more directly answer your question, too: if it were my child, I probably wouldn't feel comfortable letting him look at homework and papers that a friend had completed in the same course. I think there would be too much temptation to cheat (especially if the assignments were the same). I do think that if your daughter's bf just sat with her and helped her with her homework, giving her pointers based on his experience with this teacher, that that would be fine, and she'd probably learn more that way.
I don't think you should go so far as to get his materials and surreptitiously check her work against his. That seems to me to be too much work coming from you that should be done by her. And you don't want her to find out and then feel that you don't have confidence in her ability to deal with this situation herself.
I don't see anything wrong with what you're suggesting. She is already seeking extra help from the teacher. You're not talking about having her copy the bf's homework papers. Sometimes when I don't understand something, I just need to see what it's "supposed to" look like, and then I can figure it out. It may help her get the idea of what the teacher is looking for. I wouldn't use it as a crutch all year, but it might help right now to give her a clearer idea of what the teacher expects and where she's going wrong.
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Should she try talking to the teacher for extra help first?
I wouldn't see that as cheating, since you would only be using his work to judge hers, just to give her a few pointers.
I definitely agree that she should try speaking to the teacher first. Does the teacher have after-school help hours, or can your dd arrange to meet her to go over her homework with her? Her problems remind me a lot of the struggle my ds had with his science teacher in 6th grade. She was a stickler for rules like "homework must always be done in blue ink" and "homework must be done on a separate piece of paper." In his mind, these were minor details which he often forgot, but she would take points off every time. I'd see him sitting there obviously working hard on the assignments, but his homework grades weren't reflective of that effort. It was frustrating, but he finally just had to accept the fact that she wanted things done a certain way, and he had to comply if he wanted to pull his grades up.
Maybe if your dd sat down with the teacher and went over some of the past homework assignments with her, she could get a better understanding of where she's losing points.
But to more directly answer your question, too: if it were my child, I probably wouldn't feel comfortable letting him look at homework and papers that a friend had completed in the same course. I think there would be too much temptation to cheat (especially if the assignments were the same). I do think that if your daughter's bf just sat with her and helped her with her homework, giving her pointers based on his experience with this teacher, that that would be fine, and she'd probably learn more that way.
I don't think you should go so far as to get his materials and surreptitiously check her work against his. That seems to me to be too much work coming from you that should be done by her. And you don't want her to find out and then feel that you don't have confidence in her ability to deal with this situation herself.
I did tell her if she needed it to go to the teacher and she has.
That's the way I see it too and again I too
I'm going to sit down with Ella when she gets home today and go through her past homework and see what's going on.
This is exactly my thought process!
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