WWYD?

Avatar for mjaye2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
WWYD?
6
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 11:19am

I will try to make this very long story as short as possible.

This summer, we had a few items stolen from the house. An ipod, a jar full of change (over $100 according to ds19) and a necklace ds19 had purchased for his girlfriend. Little things that a kid could slip into his pocket and no one would be the wiser.

As a side note, we live in a teeny-tiny town, pop. about 2000 people, so everyone pretty much knows everyone, especially the kids.

Last night, for whatever reason, a kid confessed to ds15 that he had stolen the ipod and sold it to a local girl. They went over to her house and told her parents. Those parents then came to me to verify that we had indeed had an ipod stolen, then they headed over to the kid's parents. I have not spoken to those parents yet (the parents of the kid that confessed), so I'm not sure what transpired after that.

I'm pretty sure this kid didn't do this alone. I mean, it is possible, but I really doubt it. I say that mainly because about 3 weeks ago, ds15 and a friend came home and heard kids in my house. By the time ds15 got to the side of the house to look into the backyard, the back gate was open wide with no one to be found. The back door to the house was wide open when they went inside. They called the cops, but of course, there was nothing to be done by then. And it's not just me, there has been a rash of stuff stolen around town from other people.

Just to make matters more complicated, I *know* this kid. He and his older brother had been friends with both my boys all while growing up. As the kids hit high school, they went their separate ways, but still...and, I know the parents. We are not "friends" in the strictest sense, but we are definitely more than just acquaintences. We will visit with each other at ballgames and other social occassions, that sort of thing. My dilemma I suppose, is I want this kid to *turn in* his coherts. Or, at least, give me their names. I just want to know. The thing is, even if he does give me their names, what in the world am I going to do with that info? I mean, it would be strictly hearsay sort of stuff, and the odds of actually getting anything else back is slim to none. Plus, ds15 says if this kid rats out his cohorts, he will be toast at school. As in, he could get hurt. Plus, I kinda hate to go to the cops because I'm afraid the cops will prosecute this kid, and I don't think I want to go there because he *was* big enough (regardless of the reason)to stand up and say "I did this." KWIM? I just don't know if I should be proud to just get the stupid ipod back, and let the rest go, or pursue this further in hopes of getting the kids who are doing all this. Oh, and I realize there is probably no way (without the recovery of stolen stuff) to determine if this one "set" of kids is doing it all. Shoot, there could be a whole gaggle of little hoodlums that run in separate groups.

Avatar for heartsandroses2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: mjaye2002
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 11:29am

Personally, I think you should file a police report with the information you know. And let them handle the investigative stuff. They will apprise you of any new information so you have the option to prosecute, but you can also choose not to.

As far as it being a small town and everyone knowing everyone - so what? You said yourself that you are not the only one's who have been robbed. Granted, it's petty theft, but it's still stealing and if there is a small group of kids going around house to house, they should be stopped. They should have to be made to take responsiblity for thier actions. Just because you all trust each other and know all your nieghbors, and just because it's easy to force one's way into a a house, doesn't mean it's okay and should go unnoticed. I think that in the long run, you'd be teaching those kids a valuable lesson on being upstanding members of society.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2006
In reply to: mjaye2002
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 12:17pm

I'm taking the easy way out - I 100% agree with this advice. Thanks, heartsandroses, for saying it for me!

Amelia

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2005
In reply to: mjaye2002
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 1:33pm

Another one to agree 100% with hearts. Let the police handle it. You can always ask for leniency with the kid you know, the one who confessed. The other kids need to be made accountable, but let the police deal with it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
In reply to: mjaye2002
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 4:46pm

Jumping in on the 'let the police deal with it' bandwagon. It could be that these kids are doing the stealing just for kicks and because the can, but what if they tire of that and increase the stakes to bigger and more expensive items? They will get into even more trouble then.

Also, why do you suppose these kids are stealing things they can just turn around and sell? Probably for more than just kicks and thrills and money to buy drugs is the first thing that comes to my mind. (Sorry ... it's just the way my mind works. I had an expensive bicycle stolen right out from my garage some years ago and we later found out the thief rode it straight to a crack house in exchange for his fix.)

Since you mention that the thievery isn't limited to 1 or 2 housholds, and this seems to be a community-wide problem, I'm sure most people will be happy to put an end to it by discovering who the culprits are.

 

 

 

Avatar for mjaye2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: mjaye2002
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 4:58pm

To all:

Thanks ladies. I think I knew that instinctively, somehow, but for whatever reason I just needed it pointed out to me. I wasn't really sure if the police would/could do anything about it if I didn't press charges.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2005
In reply to: mjaye2002
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 5:10pm

I would call the suspected kids parents and ask to sit down with them and their child. I would tell them straight up exactly what I had been told (I wouldn't say who said this) and ask the child for his side of the story. I would then ask questions if his story didn't make sense but once I heard the story. I would let it go. If he admits to this, ask for your stuff back. Tell the child you understand he's a teen and kids make mistakes. Point out that he could go to jail for this. Give him a pretty stern lecture. Ask the parents what they plan to do in the way of punishment or teaching the child the lesson that he's missed. Thank them for their cooperation and let it go.

This is how I would handle it. I too live in a small area and understand how difficult it would be for him to rat out his cohorts. I would also get an alarm system put on my house just to make sure that my family is safe.