TORN!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2006
TORN!
4
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 9:59pm

I am a stay at home Mom of four. One in College, one entering High School, and two in Elementary. This question is concerning my 14 year old son. He is very angry and doesn't really talk to any of us. I see when he is around his friends how he becomes like another person (happy). Lately I have been snooping on his Facebook account. He talks a lot about sex. Nothing too horrible but it sounds to me like he is anxious to loose his virginity. He also talked about "liking pot". I have talked to him about drug and sex and he seemed receptive but apparently he isn't applying anything we've talked about. I already tested him for THC and it came out clean. He said the comment was joke. As far as the sex goes my main concern is that he be protected. I really feel like this is going to happen, and soon. I have talked until I am blue in the face to no avail. I DO NOT want to be a Grandma...yet. My question is should I provide him with condoms because in my opinion abstinence isn't realistic. I don't want to give him the go ahead to have sex but I also want him to be protected if he does. Any advice is appreciated. I realize that all kids are different but I never had to deal with any of this with my oldest (daughter). TIA

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
In reply to: heftyschic
Sun, 08-21-2011 - 9:36am

Hello heftyschic,

Sabrtooth and Kimmybabe both make very good points, especially re: talking WITH your DS not AT him. I have little to add to what they've said other than that Kimmybabe is right - that little gift they send you home from the hospital with is very, very awesome.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2009
In reply to: heftyschic
Sat, 08-20-2011 - 9:20pm

Gosh Sabrtooth,

So many good points, I was thinking about this as I puttered around this afternoon. Great minds think alike. LOL

Heftyschic, as Sabrtooth said,

Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
In reply to: heftyschic
Sat, 08-20-2011 - 6:03pm

Well, it is not at all unusual for a 14yo boy to be <<>>, or to like his friends a lot more than he likes his family.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2009
In reply to: heftyschic
Sat, 08-20-2011 - 1:06pm

Hugs to you Hefty,

This is a little background info that may help you in understanding where I come from on this subject. Hubby and I were bed hoppers in high school before we met in college, shared a bed freshman year, and got serious with each other senior year. Had it not been for my older sister taking me to Planned Parenthood when I was 16, I would have gotten preggers.