Children's Confidences

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
Children's Confidences
8
Fri, 10-03-2008 - 11:54pm
My seven year old daughter sometimes shares confidences with me about things that are bothering her with her friends or other things that happen at school.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2008
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 9:58am

Do not tell him. If your daughter finds out that you told her secrets she will feel betrayed and not trust you. Also in the upcoming years you want your daughter to be able to come to you and trust you with sensitive teen topics. Lastly, how would your husband feel if you told his secrets? Why are your daughters any less important?

Hope that helped.
Brandi

Brandi Davis
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2007
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 5:21pm

It may be a situation of family structure or preference, but we don't do "secrets" from family members in our household. We are all perfectly capable in our house of keeping things confidential. We expect our daughter to feel that way about BOTH her parents, not just one.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2007
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 7:55pm

Is there a reason why your daughter doesn't think her father is worthy of a confidence? Has he betrayed her trust in the past? Is he abusive or has other issues that preclude him from being a good, loving, trustworthy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2008
Mon, 10-06-2008 - 9:03am

I'm also wondering why she isn't comfortable having her father know these things.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2005
Mon, 10-06-2008 - 1:20pm

There are just some things that DD's want to tell their moms that they don't think their dad should know.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2005
Mon, 10-06-2008 - 1:24pm

I disagree.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2005
Mon, 10-06-2008 - 1:25pm

Can she whisper things to me only in her father's presence~no, that's rude and not tolerated in our home.>>>


THAT

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2008
Mon, 10-06-2008 - 2:23pm

I agree. Sometimes a girl just needs her mommy and other times it will be daddy. BUT if you have a child that is choosing to open up you do not want to close that door for any reason. If it is a matter of safety of course you must tell but if it is just girl talk or such, keep it between you. If not, when the time for big and real uncomfortable talks comes and your child feels that they can not trust you they will go elsewhere for advice and you do NOT want that.

Do what works for your family but remember that a family is ever evolving and changing and so must rules, plans for family and ideas.

Brandi

Brandi Davis
Child And Family Coaching
Sign up for your complementary 30 minute Coaching session
(p) 215-805-7494
(f ) 707-885-7494
www.ChildAndFamilyCoaching.com

Because nothing is more important than family

Brandi Davis Child And Family Coaching Sign up for your complementary 30 minute Coaching session (p) 215-805-7494 (f ) 707-885-7494 www.ChildAndFamilyCoaching.com Because nothing is more important than family