cousins in same class

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2004
cousins in same class
Tue, 02-06-2007 - 10:17am


I am in need of some advice, my 2nd grade son is in the same class as my neice, it's a small private school, there are 10 students total in the class, my son and neice annoy each other often, yesterday an innocent student got hit with a lunch box intended for my son. Nic (my son) started the mess by saying she was "mean", and it fueled until she through the lunch box. I have tried over and over again on my part to strees to my son that he can't alaways say what he thinks! I've also always been the one to enforce that the 2 "just get along". I know she starts it at times and I know he feeds on it too, and he could have gotten angry enough to toss that lunch box as well. I am constantly talking to him about this, to th epoint where I think he has tuned me out when her name comes up, he KNOWS better, but my brothers family are great "blmaers" never their fault, and I feel as if I'm the only one who wants control over this situation. I adore the school, and my brother has every intention of pulling his daughter out before middle school, I do not. I don't want to leave the school, and I've talked witht hte principal and teacher, and they just keep saying we've got to teach them to just get along. They were referred to as water & oil.

Does anyone else out there have cousins int he same class or was in a class with a cousin?

Any input would be greatly appreciated,as I think I'm on my own with this, not confident I can speak to my brother about this problem, without it being "my fault" he is the way he is!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-07-2007 - 4:25pm

That IS a situtation, isn't it?

I don't know what to say other than the teacher has got to step up and pay attention. There shouldn't be enough time in a classroom of 10 students for things to get that heated. She should be able to intervene and help cool the situation. I'm glad that you are on top of this. The school doesn't sound as annoyed or concerned with this as you are. Have they told you what they plan on doing to help?

The other thing you could do is take away his activities when he gets home. Honestly, it doesn't matter who started it; I always get on my kids for THEIR self control in a situation. Life is a lot easier and happier if you learn to walk away from the stuff that is unkind or annoying.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2007
Wed, 02-07-2007 - 10:13pm
I wasn't in same class with a cousin, but I was in same class with my Aunt (2 mths apart) for my 3,4,and 5th grade year. By this time my mom, and my step-grandmother was ready to pull their hair out. We were VERY competitive with each other and brought other children into our arguments. The start of middle school we were separated and were not in any classes at all together. After being separated our graded improved (we weren't rushing our work to get through first) and we made friends without being influenced by the other. This seemed to be a turning point in our lives and were much better friends having time apart then we were being together constantly. I would recommend if at all possible they be separated in extra curricular activities and at times throughout the day (Gym Class, lunch, study groups).