One other thing I thought of. Our other neighbor girl (who is 7) -- when she is over her trick is to whisper to one of my kids what she wants -- "ask your mom if we can have a snack, ask your mom if we can play with such and such." I see her whisper to them and 5 seconds later my kids is asking for something.
It is annoying but I don't over-react.
Thank you for giving me another point of view.
My just-turned-8 year old DD has a problem of asking for things at the next door neighbor's house (can I eat over, can I go to grandma's with you, will you take us for a bike ride).
Neighbors are extremely nice and I don't want it to get to the point that she annoys them and they don't want her over.
But, I am not there -- how am I to know she is doing it??? I have told my other DD (age 6) that if DD#1 asks for anything at the neighbor's house, to let me know. My oldest was very upset that I am having DD#2 be a snitch -- but if I can't trust her, that is the way it has to be.
BTW, my DD means no harm by it. She actually loves the girl that lives there and loves to spend time there.
No need to "banish" your DD's friends. Just make the rules clear. When they ask for food or drink say "just water -- if you want something else you'll have to go home and get it." Just be firm but friendly. You are teaching them a lesson if you do this. Also, if it is nice out don't be afraid to say everyone has to play outside.
Honestly, I do not think that the parents care.
OK, we have lived in several different neighborhoods in several different states and most peoples' rules for neighbor kids have been pretty similar.
It is so sad when parents do not have time to take care of their children.
Loving Mommy to:William Tucker, Gabriella Grace, Emmeline Elise, Natalie Kate
Thank you so much for your reply.
I should have had the 5yo clean up the toothpaste mess.
I think your plan of damage control in only letting them play outside is a good one. I, too, don't provide snacks for the neighborhood. We tend to live at the house everyone congregates at and at times there are 5 or so girls over here. We simply can't feed them all. I'm happy to provide cups of water and a box of snack crackers. When it's gone, it's gone. At dinnertime everyone leaves.
We have had issues with our daughter asking in front of her friends if they can stay for dinner. The first time it happened I was really caught off guard and said OK. Of course, with O if you say "yes" once, in her mind it's a permanent invitation. She got to the point where it was a habit every dinnertime. Now the rule is dinner invitations can only be extended if they are planned in advance or if mommy (ie, me, the cook)