My 6yo is getting bullied by older kids

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2009
My 6yo is getting bullied by older kids
8
Fri, 03-13-2009 - 11:46am

My 6 yo is in K and rides the school bus with kids from the same school up to the 4th grade. Yesturday he got into trouble for spitting in a child's face. I was apalled of course, but after investigating found out that he was defending himself from months of bullying. There are 4 boys in the 3rd and 4th grade. One of them hit him in the head, pulled his hair, pulled his hat over his eyes and shoved him into the seat. The other 3 called him "Milky Way", "Idiot", and told him to "Shut up". My heart about broke when he told me he is only safe if this other girl who is also older sits with him because she protects him.


We've talked about general teasing before and I've told him to ignore it or tell the bus driver. Obviously that isn't helping. Even when he sits far away from him they still harass him. We called the principal of the school today and reported what happened. She has said she will call us back after she speaks w/ the bus company.


I just am at a loss. He is 6! How are these older kids allowed to hit him? He's taken 3 years of TKD but they always stress not to use it in the real world (what's the point then?) so he doesn't think to block their hits. Even though we have a "no hitting" rule, I've told him at this point he can block their hits and if there is no adult to tell he can hit back to defend himself if he has to. I don't know if that is the right thing but maybe they won't think he is such an easy target if he depends himself. The whole thing makes me sick. I was tortured on the school bus for most of my school career and can't stand the thought of him going through the same. How would you handle this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2008
Fri, 03-13-2009 - 8:14pm

That makes me so mad!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2009
Mon, 03-16-2009 - 9:33am

Hi! Thanks for your reply. Having his TKD master talk to him is a great idea, but unfortunately he decided to quit TKD last month so he doesn't go there anymore. I will discuss it with him a little further and make sure he realizes that is what those skills are for. I wish he had gotten far enough to spar but he was one of the younger kids and they have to be 7 before they will let them spar.


We did talk to the principal on Thursday. On Friday morning those same kids took my son's gloves and were tossing them back and forth like "keep away", eventually kicking them under a seat.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-16-2009 - 1:45pm
I'm glad your son spoke up.
Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Mon, 03-16-2009 - 1:59pm

Bus bullies make me so mad!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2008
Mon, 03-16-2009 - 8:27pm
I'm so glad that it's working for now, hopefully it will continue.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2009
Wed, 03-18-2009 - 4:12pm
We had problems with one of the kids again yesturday, on the morning and afternoon bus. The kid said "F______g S__t" to my son, spit at him, shoved him and then in the afternoon said "Shut up Idiot". So another call to the principal. This time the principal acted like she didn't believe my son. My ex was the one to make the call and
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2008
Wed, 03-18-2009 - 7:01pm

That's so sad that it's still happening.


You made a good point that you have to work with the schools, you want to get them on your side.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2009
Fri, 03-20-2009 - 11:15am

We've talked to them and now we have finally requested the principal meet with the children's parents.


Last night we went to Chuck E Cheese and my son was playing with a boy who looked a year or two older than him. They were getting along really well and I was standing nearby the entire time and thought he seemed like a nice kid. I didn't find out until we were leaving that this was one of the boys that has been bullying my son! I asked my son about it and he said "Oh he's nice to me now". So we talked and I said it is great if you are able to make friends with "D" after all that has happened but you will have to wait and see if you two can really be friends or if he is only going to be nice when he isn't around the other kids. We will see what happens. He seemed like a nice kid and it reminded me that anyone can be a bully. I don't know if it's a matter of the kids blowing off steam because it's the only time they don't get a lot of supervision and my son seems like an easy target because he is younger or what. We will keep working with the school and I am not going to back down until this is resolved. I hope it doesn't go into next school year. It feels like we are running out of time to resolve this before the end of the year.