quiting sports

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003
quiting sports
2
Sat, 02-15-2014 - 7:52am

My oldest has played baseball since kindergarten. Last year was a challenge we didn't think he could play for medical reasons and then we got all the clear from Dr. DS was on the fence about doing it and decided last minuet but had to miss first few weeks of practice because of the medical issues. Because we didn't even know he'd be able to play until March we didn't do winter clinic so he was real rusty and because of the surgery he had a bit uneasy at first. Physically he was fine but think mentally he felt his body couldn't do things. Then he had a YELLER for a coach and his team made it all the way to the championship game and lost. He was devistated. Said never playing again. Course heard this each year and he changes his mind but sign ups are coming and no sign of change. I feel bad he thinks he is bad because he didn't have the best year but what we can't get him to realize is the other boys are practicing now at the winter clinics (they are free put on by league but not mandatory more like something to do inside on a cold winter day) He missed them last year too because we really thought with his surgery in early april he won't be playing (it was oral but they had to take bone from his hip). He isn't a BAD player. He has a great arm just needs to practice. He thinks if he isn't instantly good at something he is bad at it. We have same issues with reading.

I don't want to push but I don't want him to just quit. If he put some practice in he wouldn't be pretty good and if he takes this season off and wants to go back all his classmates will be in majors and he will have to go back the minors. He will be considered a new player and need to do a year in minors so they he will feel awkward being the almost 12 year old with a bunch of 8, 9 and 10 year olds. He is also a July birthday so his baseball age is grade level under so we had this issue in earlier levels and he towered over the kids in tball. He does want to try football so we were going to sign them up for flag football. Just hate to see him quit something. Regret things I gave up as a kid because it got hard or too invloved.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Sat, 02-15-2014 - 11:57am

<<<...Regret things I gave up as a kid because it got hard or too invloved.>>>  Don't project YOUR regrets onto your child.  Things that a child is pushed into, RARELY are enjoyable for the child.  And if he is struggling academically, which you MUST push, the LAST thing he needs, is to be involved in anything UNNECESSARY he dislikes, and that is a struggle for him.   He needs activities that he ENJOYS, and that he is comfortably good at, that make him feel like he can be successful in SOMETHING.  Maybe that is art, music, knitting, whatever.  Let him try anything he expresses an interest in, that is not a financial burden.  He WILL find his niche, and be happier for it. 

There are many ways for a child to get physically fit without engaging in team sports.  Tell him he MUST pick one activity, each six months, and stick with it at least that long.  This can include rollerblading, tennis, karate, jogging, biking, etc.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sat, 02-15-2014 - 4:53pm

Well at some point, unless he is going to be a pro baseball player, which is highly unlikely, he will have to quit baseball--so what?  I think it's bad for kids to be quitters, like in the middle of a season where the team relies on them or after the parents have shelled out a bunch of money for the uniforms, etc., but why can't he try something else?  You already said that he wants to do football, so why not just let him do football & forget baseball?  My DD started out with gymnastics around KG, did that for a few years--I was actually glad that she wanted to quit since it was getting expensive.  She did soccer for a few years and then in high school she was on the track team--she was never that great, it was more of a social activity plus good exercise--she also did a bunch of other things besides sports.  My son did karate for several years, up to a blue belt, but when his teacher closed the studio near our house, he decided he didn't want to go somewhere else--he was just never into sports.  In high school he never did sports, but has done other activities, such as being editor of the school paper and involved with some other clubs--sports are just not his thing.