How to Strengthen Relationship with Son?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2005
How to Strengthen Relationship with Son?
3
Sat, 11-08-2008 - 4:44am

Hi. I'd love your feedback. Thanks in advance.


My 13yo son is well behaved, good grades, gives my husband and I no real problems except, towards me,

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2008
Sat, 11-08-2008 - 5:39pm
Hi, I have two boys and I think we have a great relationship. I've always been close to my boys but there was a period of time when my oldest was going through major hormone issues and didn't seem to like me. I know the hurt you're feeling over that. Any mother would be upset whether it was a son or a daughter. I'm not sure what you already do with your son now but I have a few examples of what I've always done with both boys. I've always made time for each one, we call it a date. They get to pick where they want to go, we plan it and nothing gets in the way of that date. I play video games with them, I listen to their music in the car (even if it's awful) and I listen when they want to talk without judgement...but that took a lot of practice. I like to go into their rooms and just hang for a little bit and that's when they talk the most...it's the idea that you're going into their space on their terms. Basically I think if you just start spending time with your son doing things he likes, he will eventually start to be more interested in you and have a lot more respect for you.

Sylvia's Siggy


Sylvia's Siggy

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2007
Tue, 11-11-2008 - 4:31pm
Yeah, that sounds pretty darn normal to me!!!! I really recommend the book "Staying Connected to your Teenager." I love it. I have it on permanent re-reading loop. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Fri, 11-14-2008 - 11:41am
I'm divorced and my DD is at college, so it's just me & my 13 yr old DS a lot of the time. I know that when he's w/ his dad, they do all kinds of "guy things," like play golf or baseball, which I am not good at sports, but I do activities w/ him, like mini-golf or playing pool. We also have TV shows that we watch together. I could live w/o watching any TV, but I figure it's a time for us to bond. I wonder why you have become the designated nagger. Why doesn't dad do some of the nagging too, so you won't always be the one in that position? Maybe you look at your attempts to talk to your DS as a way to get close, but he looks at questions about his friends as intrusive.