11-year-old tying up a 6-year-old

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2004
11-year-old tying up a 6-year-old
Fri, 07-16-2004 - 5:45pm
Hi. Very serious. My granddaughter is almost 6 years old (latter part of October). Her best friend (only friend) is an 11-year-old girl who is next door to her parents much of the time. One day my GD wanted to come over for the weekend, and asked if GF could come along. Thinking nothing of it, my wife and I said sure, as did my GD's parents.

We brought them over on an early Friday, and the girls slept together in my son's room, who was gone for the weekend. That was no problem.

Saturday, about 1100, we went to the store, and asked the girls if they wanted to come along. They said no. We told them we would be back in a few hours. I didn't know much about GF, but figured it would be OK. We lived in a quiet neighborhood.

When we got back we didn't find the girls anywhere outside, so we look around the house. We keep our bedroom door closed, and looked there. Nothing. The basement. There we found GD stark naked, tied by the wrists hanging from a large ceiling beam, her ankles tied together and tied to a heavy iron pipe on the floor. Her mouth and eyes were covered with tape. GF was also stark naked, playing with our GD.

I yelled out, "HEY!" I never saw a little girl jump so hight as GF did. "What are you doing here?"

"I just had her tied up like we do a lot at my dad's house." She stood there just looking at me, not trying to cover herself up, as if she wanted me to see her naked. I immediately untied my GD and removed the tape, and she told me, "Grandpa, we weren't done yet!"

I told them to go get dressed. Nothing else was said and they played together as if nothing happened.I told my D&SIL about what happened, and they said they would take care of it. But now, I feel really angry, really betrayed, and a whold pletheora of emotions.

I don't think I could have done anything else though. Does anyone agree? Or could I have handled it all differently?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2004
Sat, 07-17-2004 - 11:36am
I would love to be able to offer you some advice, but I am still in shock regarding what I just read. Obviously, this is not the first time this has happened to your GD, which is what concerns me the most. Thinking that something like this is "normal" behavior to GD's friend is definitely worrisom. It makes you wonder what is going on at GF's house.

Sorry noe advice soming to mind. You are corrent to be shocked and frustrated by this situation.

Good luck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2004
Mon, 07-19-2004 - 3:10pm

I think you handled it correctly.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2004
Tue, 07-20-2004 - 2:15pm
My heart goes out to you and your family. You handled that situation really in the only way it could be. I hope that not only are your looking into to this on your gd behalf, but also her gf.

I doubt the girls came up with this game on there own. I agree that the physician should be consulted. He can also recommend a good child psychologist if needed.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Wed, 07-21-2004 - 7:20pm
because of something similar happening to a neice of mine, i would call someone to look into gf's dad's house (since her statement was that is what they do at her dad's house). child protective services can be harsh to go through when you're innocent (i know from personal experience due to my ex-husband trying to get custody of his kids) but when it comes down to possible sexual abuse (or any kind of abuse for that matter), it can be worth the risk of getting them involved. at this point in time though perhaps a school guidance councelor could peer into it and see what she can find before child protective services are called in.

everyone already said what i was going to about your precious gd! i'm not sure what i'd be feeling either and i really don't think that you could have handled it any better than you did.


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2003
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 11:28am

OMG----I am on the speechless side of this as well!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 11:51am
I don't mean to be accusing, but I would not have left a 6 year old unsupervised with an 11 year old I didn't know well in the first place.

Secondly, your gd does need to be seen by a pediatrician. You also need to ask her if she has been touched by anyone in the 11-year-olds house.

One more question - when your granddaughter said they weren't done - what else was she expecting?



Mom to two wonderful girls!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2004
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 11:54am

Hi Tammy,

Glad you stopped in and helped with this issue.