11 yo writing dark poetry, pls help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2003
11 yo writing dark poetry, pls help!
5
Tue, 05-27-2008 - 11:39am
Last night my son asked for help on a school project for which he had to make a small booklet of poetry.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Tue, 05-27-2008 - 4:35pm

Please don't assume you're doing something wrong just because your son has some dark stuff he needs to get out. It's hard to know from a single post if he's really depressed, but I can tell you that most kids, especially bright, introspective kids have some dark thoughts. Poetry can be a wonderful outlet for rage, sadness, bad moods, hateful feelings, etc--writing about pain doesn't mean he's experiencing it all the time.


Are there other signs you're seeing in addition to the poetry? He may have asked for your help with the project because he needed an excuse to show you what he'd written so that you would know what he was feeling. Ask him directly about that. If you feel he's really depressed, make an appointment with a counselor.


You can try asking his school guidance office for their input, but I wouldn't have much faith in them unless your counselors are the exception to the lousy-middle-school-guidance-office rule.


He has been through a lot, from what you say, but this doesn't mean he won't weather it well or that his poetry paints a picture of his entire life. Kids this age are really volatile, and sometimes those poems are just a snapshot of a feeling that vanishes as soon he puts it on paper. So dig a little, but don't beat yourself up. That won't help anybody.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2008
Tue, 05-27-2008 - 4:41pm
ITA with ashmama. It could also be a bit of exploration with different styles. Was the assignment to write this kind of poetry? Had they just been studying this style? Let us know how things shape up
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Community Leader
Registered: 09-14-1997
Tue, 05-27-2008 - 4:56pm

I am the mom of a 12 year old and a middle school teacher. Your son asked for help, let your read his poetry, and accepted a compliment from you. He wrote about darkness and depression, but trusts his mom enough to

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-27-2008 - 5:12pm
I agree with the others. The fact that he didn't hide it and was willing to talk about it is a very good sign. We as adults seem to think that kids should have nothing to worry about because we make their lives "easy", but starting a new grade is as stressful for them as for adults starting a new job. They get sad, have fights with friends and now he's hitting puberty and girls may be coming into the issue and he's not sure what it all means so he's found an outlet which is great. Sure beats keeping it all inside. I would keep an eye on him and if everything else seems fine I wouldn't worry much. In a while he may find another topic that interests him and the dark poems will be a thing of the past. He sounds like a good kid so try not to worry too much, but don't ignore signs either. Ahhhh, that parental fine line, how fun is that to try and walk. :-)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Tue, 05-27-2008 - 11:58pm
I think he is givng you some great signs to alert you to keep a close eye on him!

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