Anyone watch, Ivillage live?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2006
Anyone watch, Ivillage live?
2
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 1:28am
I watched it one day while running on the treadmill. They had a guy on there talking about how to raise your tweener. He said all the stuff you guys have said in various posts. I was so impressed. You mommies are very smart. :)
I'll have to find the transcript or whatever it's called and post it. :)
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2006
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 9:32am

I couldn't find the transcript on the ivillage web site. It only had the video. Here's what I did find.

No one wants to scream at their kids -- but nearly every parent has. The author of ScreamFree parenting shares 4 techniques to stay in control.

Can you parent without screaming at your kids? Is it even possible?

Hal Runkel is the author of ScreamFree Parenting. He says if we as parents keep our cool, and calm down instead of screaming, then we'll actually raise better kids.

Hal's 4 techniques:

Parenting is not about kids, it's about parents
Many parents think parenting is all about the kids, but that line of thinking makes kids self-centered, and involves parents trying to control kids. Instead parenting should be about parents controlling themselves. The parent can only be in charge of his or herself -- and should be looking at their own behavior instead of the child's.

If you're not under control, you cannot be in charge
Many parents think parenting means being in control of your child, but it really means leadership. No one follows a leader who is out of control. When parents lose control, they lose their adulthood in the child's eyes. The child then feels the parent can't be trusted.

Let the consequences do the screaming
The parent's screaming becomes the consequence -- then kids feel they need to behave just to keep the parent calm. Instead, the consequences should be something that teaches a lesson -- not the parent's screaming.

Put on your own oxygen mask first
Parents need to take care of themselves first before they can properly take care of a child. Parents are out of shape, overweight, many are smokers. They need to care for themselves -- and also take a break from the kids every now and then. Hal says people think the airlines are crazy for advising passengers to secure their own oxygen mask in an emergency before securing a child's -- but the underlying meaning is you can't help someone else until you help yourself.
For more information: www.screamfree.com

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 10:20am
Very INteresting!

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