Does anyone else have a talker?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-1998
Does anyone else have a talker?
6
Wed, 03-17-2004 - 10:19am
My ds, 10, is a talker. He is constantly getting in trouble at school lately because he won't stop. One more behavior form and he will get a remediation form and have to go to the principal. It's been this way all of gradeschool.

I have tried every punishment and technique. He is wearing me out. I have tried taking away things, no friends over, TV, Nintendo. I've spanked, I've yelled, I've threatened. I've tried being "nice" and calm. Now, we've started having him write his teacher apology letters after a bad behavior form comes home. Last night one came home because he was talking during a spelling test even after he was warned to stop.

He is a mostly "A" student, a couple of "B,s". I just am beside myself trying to think of what to do. He may be better for a couple of days, then...whammy...back to the same old kid.

The teacher said he's a good child, good heart and very nice to everyone. He just is disruptive and basically, I think, doesn't care about the consequences.

Any suggestions or comments? Please!!!

conmama

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2003
Wed, 03-17-2004 - 10:41am

When Sean was in 2nd and 3rd grade he problems with this.

Sherrie Rainbow

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 03-17-2004 - 7:12pm

Hmm, I don't have too much experience with this amazingly. My son who talks non-stop to me and anyone else manages to shut up in school. Which is probably only because he is still

Leesa

I'll hold my head high
I'll never let this define
The light in my eyes
Love myself, give it Hell
I'll take on t

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-1998
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 7:21am
You know, I have been opposed to rewarding behavior that is expected, that they know they should be doing. But, everything else has been failing. I think I'm going to give this one a shot. At this point, it sure couldn't hurt. Consider it an experiment.

One thing that he has been asking for if to have someone spend the night (I hate over nights, so I'm always trying to find some excuse that the reason is "no"). I don't mind kids coming over all day. As a matter of fact 2 weeks ago I had 8 boys in and out all day. But boy, come 7:00, I want peace and quiet in my home. Anyway, I'm going to try this as a reward. He has 2 days left this week, then 4 days next week of school before we go on springbreak. This one reward will have to wait. I might have to think of another one before then. Actually, we are going with another family. Maybe I could say his friend could spend the night with us one night there if he is good until springbreak?

If this doesn't seem to work, I'm doing the "putting his desk away from the others" suggestion. I will use that if all else fails. I did like that suggestion, though. He's a tough nut, that kid. Once, in first grade, his teacher had him all over the room, even with the most shy quietest kids. He even had them talking! LOL! He really is a great kid, I admire his friendliness. He just needs to learn when to shut it off.

conmama

Avatar for cl_janetlh
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 7:33am

I also am not a fan of rewarding expected behavior, esp. at this age. But, I think the sleep over idea is very appropriate

Janet


Jewish Family Life

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 7:27pm
I agree rewarding for behavior that is an expected thing isn't usually a good idea at this age. However when there is something that a child has a really hard time doing, such as keeping quiet, or in my sons case last year doing his homework without any fits of any type, it is helpful. I feel like since it was something that they were struggling with giving them a reward is like saying we understand its hard, but still it needs to be done.
Leesa

Leesa

I'll hold my head high
I'll never let this define
The light in my eyes
Love myself, give it Hell
I'll take on t

Avatar for partytimemom
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2003
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 1:04pm
Hi there, yes my ds (10) is also a talker, although I think it may be getting a bit better. Ever since kingergarten that has been one of the comments by teachers although they just note it in his homework journal (last year), this year the teacher told me he still talks and once she moved his desk away from everyone and that seemed to help. He also is an A-B student, who just needs to keep quiet, he tells me even though he is not talking his friends talk and he gets caught (never his fault..lol). I just told him he made honor roll and if he wants to stay on it, he has to do what is expected. I do think moving the desk helped even though it embarassed him. I also used to get in trouble for talking in school all the way thru, and so did my husband at times, guess that kind of seals the deal for my son! I used to get put in the hall or moved to, and it is embarrassing, but I believe it worked. So hang in there, One dad told me at my son's karate class that his son also gets into trouble for talking, and one teacher finally said " that's so and so", so some kids it is their personality, but they have to learn to follow the rules even so.

Tracey