DS carried playfighting/w/uncle tooo far

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
DS carried playfighting/w/uncle tooo far
Thu, 01-15-2004 - 12:32pm
On the wknd we were going to a family celebration and beforehand, My brother and my 11YO son were fooling around, playfighting, wrestling, generally roughing each other up..both were having fun with it.

The problem that came up was when we were at the hall and everybody was eating, my son walked by the table,with a big grin, and slapped my brother right across the face. I didn't see it, but my brother was furious and came over to tell me what happened.

I was never so shocked in all my life, my son has never been one to hit someone or hurt other people, even at school he has always been the one to back away from fights. Never been in trouble over it at all.(this is way out of character for him)

He said he really didn't want to hurt my bro. and thought of it as more of the playfighting etc., DS felt really bad and was very embarrassed about the whole thing.

I talked to my son about it, and explained how there is a time and a place for these things and this was neither the time or place. He should never slap anyone in the face, and he went to apologize to him. The thing was though, my brother was still really mad, made a big scene about it, almost like he didn't hear him apologize.

Later in the van I tried to explain to bro. that DS thought of it as more of the playfighting, he took that to mean I was ok with it, which I wasn't at all.

I said to my brother, what more can we do? It wasn't like I condoned what he did, I gave DS heck and he apologized to his uncle, I was getting really frustrated and it seemed like no matter what we did or said, it just wasn't enough, he wanted to keep going on and on about it and how wrong it was etc. etc.

After this fiasco I think my son has learned a huge lesson, he won't be doing this again anytime soon.

I was wondering if anyone here has had a situation similar to this one and how would you have handled it.


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Thu, 01-15-2004 - 1:46pm

Well, I can't remember one but I can see my son doing something like that without thinking before he did.


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
Thu, 01-15-2004 - 2:49pm
Thanks for the post Julie, its funny how you said tell him to "get over it", my other brother eventually said the same thing to him.

Kids will do crazy things sometimes...I was just blown away with this one.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2003
Thu, 01-15-2004 - 3:36pm

Sorry that your family celebration had a hiccup.

Sherrie Rainbow

Avatar for cl_janetlh
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 01-15-2004 - 4:56pm

Welcome to our board! I appreciated your thoughtful response on the other thread about fears, but was having technical problems posting, so welcome!

I agree that your brother was probably embarassed, and that's why he reacted out of proportion. I'm glad your other brother told him to get over it. You did the right thing by talking to your ds and having him apologize, and there's not much more that you can do. I hope your brother will realize that sometimes stuff happens with kids, adn they don't realize before they do something how inappropriate it is.


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