DS says he's completely bored
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| Thu, 05-08-2008 - 9:47am |
My DS is almost 10 and extremely bright. After school, his general routine is that he plays games on the computer for a half-hour, does his homework (which takes about 15 minutes), practices his clarinet for 15 minutes, plays baseball outside using his pitchback, and reads. He does Little League and has practice and a game once a week, but isn't interested is signing up for other things.
Lately that doesn't seem to be enough, and he complains that he's completely bored and wants suggestions. When I suggest things, he says no to every single thing. Then he becomes really upset to the point of tears. He's an emotional kid in general, but I don't understand why this would bring him to tears. He used to be able to entertain himself completely. He doesn't seem interested in any of the toys

It's very rare that my ds, 14, will tell me he's bored.
Wow!
Ramona Mom to 2 great kids and wife to one wonderful hubby since 1990!
"Lately that doesn't seem to be enough, and he complains that he's completely bored and wants suggestions. When I suggest things, he says no to every single thing. Then he becomes really upset to the point of tears....He has a stepbrother who is with us half the time, but mostly on the weekends, and he seems much happier when he has him to play with."
Based on that paragraph, it sounds to me like he is more lonely than he is bored. It sounds like he just wants someone to play with. I would continue to try to sell him on the idea of inviting some friends over once in awhile... Surely, together they could come up with something fun to do that doesn't involve video games! We have lots of video games at our house, but when friends come to play, 99% of the time they are outside playing football or basketball or riding bikes or playing capture-the-flag, etc...
Anyway, I do think some of what you're describing is partially an age/development thing; my 12-yo occasionally gets in one of those moods where he says that he is bored, our house is so boring, blah blah blah.... It's hilarious because it is so not true. But everyone gets the "grass is greener" syndrome once in awhile, where it seems that everyone else is having so much more fun at their house than you are at yours. I seriously just ignore him now when he is in one of those moods because he just wants an argument; nothing I say will appease him.
We went through this a while ago too. Evan (my ds age 11)is an extremely bright child as well and I found that he had outgrown the toys he had available and had read everything in his room two or three times so it was time to make other things available. i signed him up for an online class for gifted kids through a local university (Northwestern University's Center for Talent Development). His schedule was too nuts to go to the "brick and mortar" class. If he's a Lego fan, the robotics set (NXT) is a way cool thing though it's EXPENSIVE. Evan is also a swimmer and finds himself at a level where they practice for 1.5 - 2 hours 5-6 days/week. Maybe a little research on the internet or local library to find a project (build something, draw something, etc.) would help him find a new interest.
My kids both love to be outside and ride their bikes or rollerblade. We have a park two blocks away that they love to go to too. Is your son old enough to volunteer at a local hospital, soup kitchen, children's center, library, animal shelter, etc.)? Is there a neighbor that needs help of some sort? Scout troop that would give him goals and more boys his own age to be with? Maybe the two of you could brainstorm some things that he likes to do, write them down and put them in a jar. When he's bored, instead of coming to you, he picks something out of the jar to do. That takes you out of the equation and he has no one to argue with... Just a thought. Bottom line, he has to be willing to help himself. If he isn't, too bad so sad for him and you just go about your busy day (which I'm sure it is with an 8 month old).
Hope this sparks something to help you both...