Helping a child thru mom's illness?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Helping a child thru mom's illness?
7
Thu, 02-08-2007 - 3:15pm

I am looking for advice on helping my kids (10 yr old girl, 13 yr old boy) deal with my impending surgery. I have been diagnosed with an aneurysm in my only kidney. My treatment options are limited and we are awaiting approval from the hospital to try a somewhat experimental procedure. There are risks no matter what I do and the kids know that. We have been honest with them ( I didn't want them to hear anything in our conversations with other adults that they didn't already know.) Our friends and famiy are very supportive. Right now I plan to have the kids go to school the day of my surgery. In the evening, my husband plans to come home and take care of the kids and my dad (who also lives with us.) So far, they both seem to be handling it well. I had emergency gall bladder surgery about a year ago and my daughter confessed that she cried during the surgery because she was scared I'd die. I have assured her that death is very, very unlikely with the surgery I'll be having, but you know how people react to the word "aneurysm" and sometimes the adults in our lives inadvertently make them feel nervous. If anyone has advice on how to make this easier for them, I'm all ears. Thanks for listening!

Allie

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Thu, 02-08-2007 - 3:58pm
Allie,
I am so sorry you have to go though this. And your little ones. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Please take it easy. I am sure this must be hard. All you can do is be upfront and honest with your kids. Its good to know your telling them what they need to know. Goodluck and keep in touch.
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Avatar for bradleyteach
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2001
Thu, 02-08-2007 - 8:45pm

Hello Allie. I'm so sorry for your health problems, and wish you a successful surgery and a smooth recovery.


My children were younger, 7 and 3, when I had my mastectomy and was in the hospital for 5 days.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Fri, 02-09-2007 - 7:58am

Hi Allie,
Sorry to hear of your health issues!


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Avatar for cathiann
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-09-2007 - 11:37am
I don't have any personal experience with this, but I think being honest with them is very important.
Surviving Middle & High School
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2006
Fri, 02-09-2007 - 5:41pm

Allie, sorry to hear you and your family has to go through this. I think just being upfront and answering any ?'s they might have will do them a world of good.

I will be lifting you up in prayer for a successful surgery and a quick recovery. :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-1999
Sat, 02-10-2007 - 10:50pm

I just had thyroid surgery in Jan.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 02-12-2007 - 8:39pm
Thank you all for your support, prayers, and reassurances. :-) This past week was so "normal" - no tests, no doctors, nothing. I forgot how good normal can feel! Still no word from the hospital to schedule my surgery. It's probably just more red tape. Can't say I'm complaining, we've got some bad weather (freezing rain/ice) on the horizon, so can't say I want to make that long trip to the hospital! Thanks again, everyone. I'll keep you posted. ~Allie~