If only it were up to me!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
If only it were up to me!!
5
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 12:30am
DD will be graduating from elementary school at the end of June. She comes home from school today and she tells me her teacher approached her and asked her if she would like to "run" for valedictorian. This is a huge honor especially since there is something like 97 eighth graders. The teachers were only allowed to ask 6 kids to run. DD was asked first and she said NO. The teacher asked her why and DD tells her she doesn't like public speaking!
Now DD is mad at me b/c i told her i was disappointed in her decision. I explained i was not disappointed in her only with her choice. I don't want her not to go for things b/c she is afraid or nervous. I want her to "fight the fear and do it anyways". Do you think i am wrong? Also, when she starts high school in September she will have to do oral presentations. Hello doesn't she remember she signed up for a drama class as one of her electives ( i didn't remind her of this). I just don't get it. She does the announcements for the entire school everyday and there are just over 700 kids plus faculty. I asked her to really think about this and to talk to her teacher tomorrow about it. Did i over react? I would love for her to try. If she wins excellent but if she doesn't it doesn't really matter just as long as she tries.
Kelly
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 12:36am
I don't think you are wrong. Sometimes we have to push them a bit beyond their comfort level. I "made" Kristen do the french speaking contest. She's rather have not but she did it and I think it was a good experience for her. Our kids start doing oral presenations in class in Grades 3 or 4, several a year so they are old hands by the time they hit middle school. I think she should consider it again and like you said, if she doesn't win, nothing lost, but if you don't try how will you know? If at the end she REALLY doesn't want to you can respect her decision but encouraging her to try something out of her comfort zone is not necessarily a bad thing.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 9:33am
no you did not do anything wrong.....Your trying to encourage her as any mother would. Good for you. You need to let her know that it is okay for her to turn it down though. She has that right. Next year she will be guided on speaking... That is different. She will gain her confidence. But what an accomplishment......good for her....... Be proud no matter what. That is an honor!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 11:23am

Congrats to DD for being asked, that is a great honor!


Honestly Kelly--I hate public speaking and at her age I would have done the same thing!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-06-2006
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 12:30pm

I do not think you were wrong. I think all kids need to be encouraged to do things they are afraid of. Like you say in the end if she really doesn't want to then that's fine, but it's trying that counts.

Tonya

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 9:27pm
I know and i also hate public speaking. She thought about it last night but when she got to school this morning all of the ballots were printed and ready to go. There were three kids names on it and according to Tegan she was the only other person asked. Well her best friend won!! She is a great kid and she won't be nervous in the least.
I told her she has 4 years to work up the courage for a speech if she is asked at the end of high school....LOL
Thanks for your input.
Kelly