To leave at home?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2003
To leave at home?
Wed, 06-02-2004 - 12:29pm
Okay..I have a question.

Recently the engine in my car went out and my husband and I are stuck with one car right now.

I have to be at work by 6:00am. My husband is a independent contractor so he can make his hours accordingly.

I have a 10 yr. old boy (he will be 11 in Oct.) He is the MOST responsible kid for his age. Very mature and logical. He has never been in trouble and has been a straight A student since the 2nd grade.

What they have been doing is getting up at 5:30 to take me to work. I feel kind of bad that my son has to do this. He has to be at school at 8:30 but my husband usually drops him off around 8:00 on his way to work.

When they get back from dropping me son usually is not tired so he won't go back to sleep. He says he is not sleepy throughout the day because of this, and it has not effected him at all as far as being tired once he gets home from school. The only problem is when we wake him up at 5:30 he does not want to wake up and is groggy and a little whiney, but once he is up he is okay with it.

I sometimes wonder if we should leave him there while my husband takes me to work since he would be asleep anyways but it just does not feel right. I have always been very I'm not sure if this is just me being too overprotective or is this normal.

I've asked my son if he would like to stay and sleep while dad takes me to work but

he always says he'll go with us.

It's weird because I see some kids were I live that come home from school by themselves and they are there alone until the older sibling or parents get home.

And I know my son is way more trustworthy and responsible then them.

I just don't want to not know when to let go a little bit.

My job is about 20 min from home each way with traffic.

I always worry about if we do leave him,what if we get into a accident, or if theres a earthquake.

Are these worries normal? LOL!

I think even if he was 25 I would still be a worry!

Any advice anyone?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-1998
Wed, 06-02-2004 - 1:26pm
Wow, what a pickle to be in. I would worry too. My ds will also be 11 in October and I won't let him stay alone in the house yet. I just started letting him ride his bike to friend's homes in the neighborhood (he has to call me as soon as he arrives).

Anyway, back to your issue. Let's see, your dh will be gone for about 45 minutes. I think if I was in the same situation and had a very mature 10.5 year old son, I would let him sleep. There would have to be LOTS of rules. Plus, I would get a cellphone so he could call you at a moment's notice. Even to tell you that someone is knocking on the door or whatever.

If you don't have one already, invest in a smoke detector and make sure you renew the batteries every 6 months. I have a smoke detector not only in our bedrooms, but in the hallway, the downstairs hallway and the basement.

If he wants to go with you in the mornings, let him. What is his bedtime now?


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2003
Wed, 06-02-2004 - 1:52pm
His usually 9:30.

I know I am pretty leanent with him about his bedtime because he is such a excellent student.

He goes to bed a little earlier some nights when he is tired and stays up a little later when he is not.

Avatar for suzyk2118
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-1997
Wed, 06-02-2004 - 2:05pm
ITA - get a cell phone for your dh, and also talk with neighbor(s) just in case something happens and your ds needs help from them right away (or just needs to go over there). So many kids are sleep-deprived these ds isn't one of them, but definitely doesn't like when I wake him at 6:30 (so he has an hour to wake, dress, eat, etc.,before we go), even though it's after 9.5 hours of sleep!


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2004
Wed, 06-02-2004 - 2:10pm
I'm sure it wouldn't be a problem. You didn't say how long it takes for your husband to drop you off. I leave my 10 year old home alone for about an hour or so when I run some errands. Sometimes it's both the 10 & 9 year old. But my 9 year old doesn't want to stay by herself. She's not ready. I have an alarm system on my home that includes the smoke detector. They have instructions no cooking!! No going outside!! No answering the door!! I also have my cell phone on at all times & I have plenty of wonderful neighbors. My children don't know it, but I usually tell one of my neighbors that the kids are alone. I call & check on them & sometimes I cut my trip short & surprise them. So far nothing bad except the normal sibling rivalry.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2003
Wed, 06-02-2004 - 3:22pm

Hello and welcome.

Sherrie Rainbow