not looking forward to Thanksgiving

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2006
not looking forward to Thanksgiving
28
Mon, 11-05-2007 - 12:46pm

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 11-05-2007 - 6:07pm
Welcome to the board. I'm afraid I don't have much advice, but I'd say decide on a punishment for poor behaviour, inform her of this at a quiet time and then follow through. Do not engage her and get into a screaming match. It takes away our power and they know it. Walk away sometimes if you have to. If she argues about dinner just shrug your shoulders, keep doing what your doing and ignore her. She'll either eat it or she won't. Of course she'll ramp it up at first to try and get the desired reaction, so you have to be prepared, but I would refuse to bend. Some things in life are non-negotiable, better to teach her that now. Hopefully someone else can offer some better advice.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Mon, 11-05-2007 - 6:20pm

I plain and simple wouldn't not engage in the argument with her.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2006
Mon, 11-05-2007 - 6:26pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 11-05-2007 - 6:54pm
I'd let her cry. Annoying as it is, I'd refuse to give in. Ignore ignore ignore and she will pay a price later for her behaviour. That is where you have to come up with your list of punishments before you leave home. If you do X, the result will be Y and no amount of crying will get you out of it. In fact the more you cry the longer the punishment. If you remove computer privileges, the longer she cries, the longer she loses her privileges. You and your DH have to be onside though, do not yell (I would pull over though and force her to move seats because its dangerous to have her kicking the driver) and then continue on your way. It will seem like its harder on you than her at first, but you just have to grit your teeth and get through it. She'll figure out it doesn't work. Good luck.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2006
Mon, 11-05-2007 - 6:59pm

What do you do in the car? Simple... Pull over and wait until she is calm. Trust me it works. I've done it. Explain before you leave that her behavior is too distracting and just plain dangerous. If she continues to have a tantrum, she needs to get out of the car. If she doesn't, privileges will be taken away.

A little personal story. We were driving along and ds did/said something really mean to dd and he had already been warned so I pulled over. His behavior got worse so I asked him to leave the car. While he was waiting outside, his favorite librarian walked by and asked him if he was okay. He explained that he was kicked out of the car and why. She tapped on the window of the car, I opened it and she said "you're a good mom. Keep it up". Guess what... I haven't had to pull over since! :)

Good luck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2006
Thu, 11-08-2007 - 10:36am

Community Leader
Registered: 12-16-2003
Thu, 11-08-2007 - 10:40am
The reason she does it she knows she can in front of an audience.

Ramona  Mom to 2 great kids and wife to one wonderful hubby since 1990!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2006
Thu, 11-08-2007 - 10:52am

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2003
Thu, 11-08-2007 - 1:05pm

I totally agree with those who said to lay down the rules ahead of time and stick to them.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2005
Thu, 11-08-2007 - 5:29pm

If my daughter pulled that crap while my DH was driving, he would pull over and spank her butt.

209.jpg picture by shellflower72obsessed.gif image by shellflower72

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