P***ed about my daughter

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-07-2004
P***ed about my daughter
5
Sat, 05-10-2008 - 10:00pm
I have somehow raised a spoiled, selfish, self centered little brat. And I don't know what to do about it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2008
Sun, 05-11-2008 - 9:24am

I just want to start off by telling you that you aren't alone!!! My 11 yo ds says similar things. "I hate you" "I hate this house" "I'm running away" "I'm outta here." Each and every time he gets a time out and must apologize! I ignore the actual words and concentrate on the intent to be rude, disrespectful, and hurtful. I don't think your dd really means it but she knows which buttons to push to make you feel bad and uses them to retaliate.

When I'm giving the time out, I really do just ignore the words themselves. We don't discuss why he wants to run away or anything like that, he just gets busted for "rudeness" and I handle it just like I would if he called me "fat" or a b-word.

Meez 3D avatar avatars games
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Sun, 05-11-2008 - 12:41pm
Welcome to being the parent of a hormonal tween!!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-07-2004
Mon, 05-12-2008 - 7:29am

Thanks for the words of empathy...I have been feeling so guilty (Mom's greatest fault, lol) because I CAUSED ALL THIS!! My son and his dad are bosom buddies, they each think the other can do no wrong, so if I don't stick up for her, she's alone. SOMEONE has to be on her side. Of course, this has backlashed into a position of disrespect and rudeness. Even when she IS in the wrong, my guilt wilts my backbone.

"Daddy doesn't like me", "I know Nick is your favorite", just breaks my heart...mostly because when the backtalk and the rudeness start, she's RIGHT!

Community Leader
Registered: 12-16-2003
Mon, 05-12-2008 - 3:43pm
Breathe in and breathe out!!

Ramona  Mom to 2 great kids and wife to one wonderful hubby since 1990!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Tue, 05-13-2008 - 4:57pm
We use essays, too. They are a great way to make the child think about what respect really means and how it feels to be truly sorry for doing wrong.